The Comic Book League at NYU

Fall 2011 Publication: Attack of the Manhattan Whale!

2012-01-28T14:28:00.004-05:00

Select here with news and such.

The Fall 2011 Publication has been out for a week, so go pick up your copy at Kimmel 7th Floor if you can.

IN OTHER NEWS,

We'll be at the Spring 2012 Club Fest this coming Tuesday. Feel free to stop by to give your support and pick up your copy of the publication there as well. In addition, if you feel like volunteering some time to maintaining the table at said club fest, send President Mike an e-mail or find him on Facebook. Incidentally, you can tell us whether you can help on our Facebook group page as well.

Our official meetings shall begin this coming Thursday at 7 PM Kimmel 7th Floor. Hope to see you all there!

~Select

Meeting Minutes (12/15/11) LAST MEETING OF THE FALL SEMESTER

2012-01-05T18:23:00.008-05:00

Select here.
Sorry it took so long for me to get back on the internet and update the last of the meeting minutes. While I did spend the first week after the last meeting of the Fall semester working on finals, I had some things to do at home.

I turned this:

Into THIS:

And all in a span of ten collective days, working from ten to six with my dad.

But enough of me, let's get the last of the meeting minutes up and running:

MEETING MINUTES:

7:00- You should play piano (they yelled at me) but I had ADD ~Dan

7:09- Samuel L Jackson is Javi's shrink

7:12- speaking of Boners, Santa has a holiday Log ~Javi

7:14-

7:18- Seth wants Superman's head hanging over his fireplace

7:23- Mary Jane was run over by a bike

7:28- Kryptonians hatch from eggs apparently

7:32- Gotham City is the Jersey Shore of the DC universe

7:35- Considering NYU is "Empire State University" in the Marvel universe, would Peter Parker come to the Comic Book Leauge meetings?

7:43- DOOMCON2011 ~Leading Panel: How to Defeat Reed Richards. ~Guest Stars: Luke Cage, MODOK, and Doctor Doom Himself

7:52- Can we have a moment of silence for the Jaws and Back to the Future ride in Universal Studios?

7:58- The kid from Ape Escape should go get the people from Rise of the Planet of the Apes 2

8:06- Disney has an Ellen ride

8:20- the Squirtle Squad arrested by Officer Jenny for being an organized crime syndicate

8:25- We talk about creating Pokemon in real life with the magic of genetics

8:47- Are we collecting pound puppies? ~Dan

8:52- The Omnipotous God being the Lorax is now Danny Devito

9:38- We recall the Legend of the Hidden Temple

9:56- looks like the Hunter became the Huntress...

10:21- let's just smith some Dwarven Axes ~Andrew

10:24- Comic Book League presents "Gorilla Head Cheese"

10:26- Dog Dick, He's a dog and he's a detective

10:33-

10:35- Next CBL we're recording a Satanic Album for the holidays

10:44- Our Top Priority for the next session: dress as Fantasm inspired Druids and go to the Bobst Library late at night, surround people and make creepy pagan chants to scare the crap out of them. What we need; elk horns, Renassiance doctor masks, robes and elevator shoes

WELL, that's the end of that. I hope to see all you cool cats in the next semester.

~Select

Meeting Minutes (12/8/11)

2011-12-09T16:19:00.003-05:00

Select here with the Meeting Minutes.

Well, let's get the second to last batch of the semester out, shall we?

Note: I have been spelling Eiton's name wrong this whole semester. My apologies for that, but then again no one corrected me.

MEETING MINUTES

6:39- Select sent his publication to a different Mike

6:43- Purple Man gets a purple rings

6:54- Twilight Sparkles can beat the crap out of Superman

6:57- Bo Obama would be the Bryan of the White House

7:02- (Manhattan Whale is) just a lonely creature in a lonely world ~Andrew Scott

7:06- Rebekkah and Seth are sitting on the floor

7:07- If society is the Babysitters Club, then we are the Boxcar Children

7:09- The Mystery Machine is voiced by Louis Black in Mystery Inc.

7:10- The Magic Schoolbus goes into Arnold in one episode

7:13- Eugine, Urkel and Arnold in one room would destroy the universe

7:15- Someone should've put Helga out of her misery

7:19- The Sorting Hat is helpful in decision making: "Not Soup, Not Soup."

7:24- Everyday is Select's unbirthday

7:27- Seth wants to make a fanficiton about the Comic Book Leauge

7:30- Dark Knight Rises 2: Comissioner Gordon gets is groove back

7:35- Deathstroke the Terminator: I wear Orange because I'm AWESOME

8:56- Fact: The CBL biggest readership are the people under the stairs

9:09- We're aking REALLY bad Cars puns

After that, we went over what was left of our meeting minutes and stuff. It would've helped if I actually wrote quotes rather than actions...

Select

Meeting Minutes (12/1/11)

2011-12-07T14:10:00.006-05:00

Select here and all that jazz. Didn't updated immediately since I was playing Back to the Future the Game, which was on sale at Steam at the time.

PUBLICATION

The publication deadline is tomorrow, so if you didn't work on it within the 24 hours and/or finished it, I recommend that you buy an ocarina in the nearest music shop and play the Song of Time to get three days back. But don't worry, just do your best as we're doing this again next semester. :D

If you wish to proof-read the publication before it is to be turned in, contact Mike

But anyway, onto the Meeting Minutes...

MEETING MINUTES

7:00- Select explains the Origin of Power Girl... again...

7:01- Mary Jane joined the Republican Club just to get a shirt

7:03- Dumbledore hates all the Slytherins

7:04- not all Slytherins are evil, they're all just assholes.

7:04b- Our team for the CBL is now officially the Fighting Googlebottoms

7:05- The Tin-Tin movie should've started Tauntaun

7:11- We talk about the Muppets movie or something

7:13- Alan Moore HATES the Killing Joke

7:15- Mary Jane stayed on an elevator for 3 hours just for the hell of it

7:18- Select forgot the female character's name in the Manhattan Whale stories

7:19- Dan: (Scott McCloud) YOU LOOK NOTHING LIKE HOW YOU DO IN YOUR BOOKS!

7:21- Manhattan Whale issue 1 to be in CBL reprint

7:24- Autocorrect won't let Dan say "2pac," instead correcting him to "Gulag"

7:27- Dan makes a most motivational speech about how love doesn't exist as it's a forced guilt mechanism in the human condition. What we as humans have left are the necessities to eat and to create. However, our only meaning is to create in this club and we are obligated to submit anything.

Also, Twilight Sparkle: Breaking Down...

7:34- Bababooie ~Mike (ok, this didn't happen but...)

7:38- Dan calims that Freshmen have little work, which pisses Cat and Mary Jane off

7:39- Veronica actually pissed on John Simmons in Archie meets KISS

7:48- Arman and Cat proof read Select's comics like editors

7:53- Arman is best friends with the Sprouse Twins apparently, which explains a lot

8:04- Taimur sings song from the Brandy Bunch soundtrack

8:08- Will just kind of left

8:09- All Christians are Jesus eaters

8:14- Harry Potter porn parody planned by an anonymous member of the League...

8:16- Batman 3: Riddler on the Roof

8:20- half of the club leaves to get free egg nog and cookies, which may be a trap

8:32- Mary Jane and her friends talk about Creepers who hit on them

8:33- Eric Ding, a close acquaintance to Select, is apparently the Vice President of the Republican Club 0__o

8:40- Javi and Rebbekah were here the entire time

9:04- Who wants to be a Chamelionaire?

9:22- Pi is 4 more often than not...

9:27- We're planning a Googas party apparently...

9:30- Neville went hot by the last movie ~Mary Jane

9:45- Yugioh is the landmark for being pagan

Well enough of that, Select out...

Obituaries and Thanksgiving and Muppets

2011-11-27T09:43:00.010-05:00

Select here with some Comic Book Leauge- oh wait. It was Thanksgiving that Thursday, wasn't it... Christ.

Well, I guess I can put stuff on here or something:

OBITUARY (11/23/11)

Here's to Jeanne Sanders, who helped raise a young Select when he was but a lad before grade school. It was she who first gave him a cartoon drawing book at a young age and kick started his obsession of the medium. She was a great family friend and her friends and family shall miss her dearly.

THANKSGIVING (11/24/11)

There's no such thing as a Thanksgiving break for Select, having 3 take home exams, a 300 character oral presentation, a CBL publication, a short story of 4 pages and other things to worry about while going to Boston. Not to mention people passing away that ruins the holidays but life just likes to kick people in the testes when they're down.

Normally the CBL would be meeting together to host a reinactment of the last supper with whatever we can afford in our budget at Kimmel, but unfortunately we all have families and are obligated to see them so that plan was left out.

BLACK FRIDAY (11/25/11)

Captialism working it's best. Right after an intimate portion of the holidays where you get to see your loved ones again after a long spell of study, you immediately celebrate that by buying discounted stuff in large quantities. Oh capitalism.

Or you could've watched the Muppets movie like Select did instead. Overall, I liked the movie and felt that it deserved the prayers it received, so as to not go into spoilers I shall not dive deeper. Some gripes exist in it though like how Fozzie's voice sound off several times in the movie and such, but overall the movie was fantastic. Definitely earns Select's thumbs up if you want to go and see it

"He spent his Black Friday watching THAT movie?"

"Probably meant the entire mall was sold out by the time he got there"

Anyway, Select out

Meeting Minutes (11/17/11)

2011-11-21T10:02:00.006-05:00

Select here with Meeting Minutes. If you're wondering why it took so long to get these up, please note that some people are just slackers and can decide whenever they FEEL like the meeting minutes to go up to go up. Anyway, here's the minutes and all that jazz:

MEETING MINUTES

6:55- Being Ryan Gosling has to be a movie

6:57- Javier is making a New 52 version of the Comic Book Leauge characters. Be sure to look for that in the next publication

7:06- (overlooking or on the George Washington Bridge) THAT'S WHERE GREEN GOBLIN KILLED GWEN STACY, YOU JERK!

7:08- Octopi Wall Street

7:10- Jackie Chan can sell a Smoothie to a health freak as depicted in a randomly flashing television ad.

7:12- Select forgot what Manhattan Whale is a parody of

7:13- Mary Jane stayed for 2 minutes before going away

7:18- Citrusy rice at Chipotle is what Andrew doesn't like

7:20- Taimur the legacy member is back

7:24-There was a turtle in Diddy Kong Racing that no one saw again

7:28- The New Avengers EAT in every issue

7:41- Rebekkah got a WOW account for the Pandaren

7:43- Name your fu: TOE-FU

7:47- Javier wants to see the Flash played by Neil Patrick Harris in a musical (supposedly it's the perfect role)

7:52- The Speed Force IS Barry Allen

7:55- The Cutiemark Crusaders are the Metal Men of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic

7:59- "...and that's how Communists work." ~Aton

"EXCUSE ME"~Select

8:04- Santa Claus is like the Spectre. He possesses parents' bodies and materializes presents under the tree and in the parents' bodies he eats the treats. Why else do you see your parents doing the stuff Santa supposedly does?

8:13- Select sings the Wonder Woman Theme Song

8:18- Nightwing's lesson from Batman: Don't trust anyone- even me

8:43- Notes and such :D

8:47- Jack Napier walked into the room

8:48- Select forgot what he was going to write

8:50- Brandon asked for the name of Marie. Select forgot both of their names (play Twilight Zone music here)

8:51- The words "Rusty Forks, Googas and Victorian shirt" are used in the same sentence

9:03- Venture is a sexual Tyrannosaurus

9:08- Samurai Jack is supposedly to be made as a Live Action thing

9:21- Somehow the discussion sarted to lean towards the Matrix, Cowboy Bebop and Big O.

9:25- Power Girl's origins are explained

9:27- Phantom Stranger is basically a magical Question

9:29- You suck a bag of dicks... and penises too

9:37- Captain Marvel can't break from the Kingdom Come lightning move

9:44- We saw women in all flavors of availability (from lesbians to religious zealots)

Well, that's the meeting for ya. Have a great Thanksgiving and hope to see you fine folks next meeting. Don't forget that the publication is due December, so don't let Black Friday (Rebecca Black Friday) and turkey comas get in the way of your creative hand.

~Select

Meeting Minutes (11/10/11)

2011-11-13T15:40:00.011-05:00

Select here with the Meeting Minutes and all that jazz.

We had some cool cats from whalejawpress.com come over to our meeting today to talk about their stuff. Specifically, MIke and Casey from OUR HERO came and hung out with us. Whether they decide to stick around more in the future is up to them, but that's to note...

But enough of that, let's get onto the Meeting Minutes or whatnot...

MEETING MINUTES

6:44- Sometimes, Namor can control fish (Fair enough)

6:46- Dan demands (Shazam) Captain Marvel in a bikini

6:51- Javier is in MARVEL Point One

6:53- Select: YOU ASSCRACK!

6:54- Mike, Michael, Mikey

7:00- Aton brought enough Cheez-It's to share for everyone

7:03- Nova says EPIC FAIL (again, Marvel Point One)

7:10- Blackest Night cupcakes made from real zombies

7:18- Seth really writing a Swamp Thing porn parody

7:20- Kat just died. RIP

7:26- Select IS the meeting minutes

7:29- Kat has a criminal record

7:30- Seth debates to find a heterosexual sassy comic book character. Kid Loki is Sassy

7:31- Karl Marx is the only thing that makes Kat happy

7:32- Starfox is apparently a sassy superhero (not the Nintendo one, the Marvel one)

7:33- Tom Hanks can sell Ice to a Polar Bear

7:44- Wizard 2 is what's everyone's waiting for

7:45- Wizard quote of the day "HE TOUCHED MY BREAST"

7:49- Dr Manhattan can disintergrate at will

7:55- Loki knows Internet memes

7:58- DC Relaunch is more Republican "Don't Ask Don't Tell"

8:04- Alfred- "Master Bruce, I've organize your titty collection."

8:11- Uatu the Watcher allowed to sleep! Who knew? (picture this, the Watcher in Joel/Mike's job in Mystery Science Theater 3000)

8:14- Armon created the most awesome Scarecrow spin-off concept ever

8:18- MJ not here. Apparently she's a traitor...

8:20- There's talk of a Manhattan Whale X New York Narwhal shipping amongst the members 0__o

8:27- Michael Jackson spawned from Michael Jordan going through the cartoon world in Space Jam

8:30- the true tragedy of DC Universe Online is that all Braniac wanted was a pair of pants.

8:33- Black Cat, you're a whore

8:39- Dan is stuck in a chair

8:40- Dumb Batman is Dumb

8:42- Jim Lee's Scooby Doo Adventure to be planned

8:55- Comics are for kids :D

9:06- Superman's stealth is to fly/run so fast that one cannot see him!

9:09- Chris Angel VS Superman, who would win?

9:11- The 90's ARE BACK :D

9:16- Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a crazy girl...

9:27- Batman on MAURY...

9:34- necrophilia exists for a reason, romancing the corpse with GELATO

9:35- Cunning-linguist

9:39- CBL Afterhours: Venom Sex Line. Mostly talk of tounge "You can wear me like a symbiote"

10:12- Prophecy of Brad Pitt's death from Dan. To happen on Kat's Birthday

10:28- CRACKULA RISES AGAIN

Meeting Minutes (11/3/11)

2011-11-06T18:59:00.014-05:00

Select here with some Comic Book League meeting minutes and the like.

Sorry I haven't updated the blog yet as DC Universe Online went Free to Play and so I was allocating all of my resources to playing it. Which reminds me...

NEWS:

DC Universe Online went Free to Play

My character Captain Jiong (囧) posing with my favorite DC heroine Power Girl :D

You can get more info here and get a free 17 GB game. Granted, if you want more character slots and the like you'd have to pay a minimum amount of 5 dollars, but I'll let you check that info here. For now, let's get the minutes rolling :D

MEETING MINUTES:

7:00- Am I my Dan's Keeper?

7:04- George W Bush wouldn't let Javier into the country

7:06- Obama met Spiderman and that was canon until "One More Day" happened

7:10- The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles in the new comic series look like Geico Geckos.

7:14- We talk about Skymall and its excellent wares

7:20- We talk about the Arkham City game

7:25- The good side of New Jersey is in fact Fawcett City, home to Captain Marvel. Incidentially, it is fictional for a reason

7:28- Batman uses the Bat Credit Card at Jamba Juice

7:29- Manssoe is a hard name to say :D

7:30- Stocks Surge, a Liefield villain that has arrows for feet

7:36- What if Nicholas Cae was the Punisher?

7:38- Nicholas Cage eating live cockroaches

7:40- TGIF is a fine establisher ~Will

7:41- Dan's brother is a Kid Penguin

7:53- JUSTICE JUSTICE JUSTICE JUSTICE

7:54- Grease the movie ended as a scifi movie with flying cars

7:59- The Koribo Shoe :D

8:00- Bill Gates has a headcrab on his head

8:03- Seth upset if surgeon used satanic powers to slow down time in order to save his life

8:07- Shazam shoes given to Little Bowwow

8:10- We should train in Shaq-Fu

8:15- Deku Princess is Zelda's counterpart in Majora's Mask

8:25- Eid-Eve is the day before Eid

8:29- Select as reboot J. J. Jameson (calmly stating "Parker... Give me pictures of Spiderman)

8:33- Jimmy Buffett runs for Gotham Mayor position. "Gotham will become a Cheeseburger in Paradise" (personally, I would think it to be Magaritaville)

8:35- Porn parody of the Swamp Thing to be planned

8:36- Bruce Banger, the scientist in the Hulk porn parody "The Bulk"

8:37- Titizan Cane, follow the pattern and you'll get the idea

8:49- Arman is a racist jerk, comparing Chinese people and Japanese people as one in the same (like comparing Jews to Nazis)

8:53- THE MANHATTAN WHALE HAS GONE MAD WITH POWER AND HAS GAINED A TASTE FOR HUMAN FLESH

8:54- Pegs fall from space and Rihanna is a Marine

9:01- Avenging Spiderman is a waste of time

And with that, the meeting minutes surpirsingly finished early. I don't know what Satanic or pagan forces made it this way, but who am I to question it?

Select

Meeting Minutes (10/27/11) HALLOWEEN PARTY

2011-10-29T16:14:00.013-04:00

Select here.

We had a most excellent and fun Halloween Party where we ate snacks, drank Ecto Cooler, ate "Blackest Night" Cupcakes, and watched several movies. It was a blast and even though it was cold enough to freeze hell out there the club tanked it out to get to the party and we had a spooky and excellent time.

MEETING MINUTES

6:42- Rebekkah scared by Select wearing a blond wig with his Greatest American Hero costume

Believe it or not, Select's walking around

6:50- Más y Menos speaks English in the Mexican version of the Teen Titans cartoon

6:55- We do Christmas Carols of non-Christmas songs

7:06- We don't want to see Javier drunk as apparently he's a sad drunk and he can't hold his alcohol

7:09- Melodie brings some awesome cupcakes (Select personally hopes none were made from REAL ponies)

On a side note, Select took and ate the Maxwell Lord cupcake

Let's see you talk your way out of this one, Maxwell Lord. This is for Ted Kord!

7:22- The encyclopedia of Comic Books is aparently Wikipedia

7:23- Javier twiching about since something went down his shirt (he has to take it off, Hasslehoff)

7:27- Javier and Rebekkah want to sproing Select's curls

7:33- Santa Claus is the same as the Swamp Thing

7:35- Dan rather go to the Frankensteins on Halloween (both creator and monster) than to Robin Williams' house.

7:39- We talk about Jingle All the Way starring Arnold Schwarzenegger.

7:41- the Final Destination film series scares Mary Jane

7:55- We migrate to Room 903 of Kimmel in order to watching some movies

8:06- Dan explains the TRUE origin of Halloween, which was popular in ancient Greece and Mexico as "The Day of the Pedophil

8:11- We watch the Mickey Mouse 1937 special = Lonesome Ghost

8:13- Wendy hates all of us after we booed her on the phone

8:31- We do an Olsen Twins based quiz show to pass the time

8:35- We watch the Googas, which was mad scary

8:45- We start our feature presentation: Trick r Treat.

10:05- We finished the movie, loving every moment of it.

10:12- We're going to make comics ONLY on the Googas now

10:13- Googas II: Electric Googahoo

10:15- Mary and and friends decided to come back AFTER the movie. Apparently, they had their own party filled with Turkish dancing and attempts to attract the lady types.

10:19- We watched Woody's Race, which was undoubtly the SCARIEST thing we've seen that night

After that, we listened to music videos of Ghost Busters and the Munsters theme song and the like and did some excellent dances. With that, our party came to an end and we all had fun. By the end, there was but one cupcake left too, so great job on that Mel! :D

Hope you all had fun that day.

Select

Meeting Minutes (10/20/11)

2011-10-22T14:12:00.007-04:00

Select here with the meeting minutes and all that cool jazz.

Well, I hope that you all had an awesome Comic Con (for those who joined us, otherwise you missed out on something magical). I'll not state anymore than the fact that most of us had a wonderful time.

But anyway, let's get to the minutes or whatever.

MEETING MINUTES

7:01- Power girl noted for her costume...

7:05- SHAZAM! Curse of Shazam to reappear the Big Red Cheese this January of Justice League #5. Hooray! :D

7:07- Javier and Select talk of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic's equivalent of Captain Marvel, Captain Friendship. A Young Philly Batson would get to use the Elements of Harmony by yelling the horse wizard's name: TRAPFR!

7:18- Ambush Bug was in Arkham Asylum

7:20- Phantom Stranger has NO backstory

7:26- Fear Itself ended with the cast becoming Jim Henson's MARVEL babies ie the Super Hero Squad

7:32- Archie should choose the Harem ending and mary BOTH Betty and Veronica

7:39- Jimmy Olsen never gets any Superman ass like Lois Lane ~Dan

7:52- A baby doing Soulja Boy'

7:54- Amanda wants a baby so to put it in a watermelon

7:58- Jim Lee will give Mr. Mind worm boobs in Curse of Shazam much to the dismay of the DC community

8:06- The kids from Kid React to are discrimatory

8:23- Aton perked up when we mentioned "What if PBC's Nova was 4 different people?"

8:26- Nick Cage is what you get when you transfer Samuel L Jackson to a white person

8:27- Javi and Rebekkah still playing Magic

8:39- Spiderman's an asshole (at least in What If? Classic)

8:45- Sexy Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles at Comic Con

8:47- Mary Jane gives away a bunch of body wash that looks phallic for some odd reason

8:49- Seth is an asshole. He smells like Beef Curry tastes and wears women's clothing and hangs around in bars.

9:03- We talk about college for some odd reason

9:26- Hooded Woman in all the DC New 52 is Supergirl-Prime

9:30- Select likes characters that no one gives a crap about, especially if they're from the Silver Age

9:35- Brandon asks that he is mentioned subtly.

9:36-NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

9:38- Now we're talking about how coffee tastes

9:43- This got really quiet: John Malchovitch

9:44- John from Garfield is really John Malchovitch

9:45- Select outwitted the Devil himself

9:55- Heated debate on whether Superman or Batman would win in a fight. Personally, I think Captain Marvel is the best. (Kingdom Come is proof he can best Superman and Batman)

10:03- Dan nosebleed to Namor in a shell thong

After this, we went and got cookies and there was a heated debate of Socialism or something that lasted for several hours or something. I didn't care further than that.

Anyway, till next time.

Select

Meeting Minutes (10/8/11)

2011-10-08T09:00:00.007-04:00

Select here,

COMIC CON GROUP TOUR

Well, in a good few short days is New York Comic Con. I need not state that this is a major event and it's all exciting to go by oneself, yet why do that when you can go with your very own Comic Book League? Around 10 to 10:30 AM each day we'll be meeting on the corner of 11th Ave. and 35th St. to go in as a group. As I Select already got my tickets online, I more likely will be going in ahead by a further down gate, however, I'll catch up afterwards. If there's any specific event or booth you wish to go to with the group: feel free to bring it up in the meeting. If you plan to meander and do you own thing midway while we're in a group, feel free to: you have every right to see the events you want. If you think you are going to want to find us midway, contact one of the senior members on the coming meetings for a contact number.

The key to enjoying most conventions is to have a vague plan of what you want to see and just go to the ones most convienent at the time, so be sure to plan ahead and all that jazz.

OTHER THINGS

I'm holding a personal quest to group together the worst comics we can find on Manhattan, so to mail it to a comic book reviewer who reviews bad comics on purpose: one Linkara of Atop the Fourth Wall.

This is a long term project, so I'm willing to wait a while so there is no ending date (Save for the very last meeting of the school year). If you have any really bad comics you've found, feel free to contact me or show it for a meeting. I'm just a personal fan of the guy so to donate comics to him will be optional.

MEETING MINUTES:

6:39- Superman was always a jerk

7:03- We made each of our Top 3 favorites list of the New 52. (mine was Aquaman, Demon Knights and Wonder Woman)

7:09- No one liked Red Hood and the Outlaws

7:13- Sarah's back :D

7:15- $3.99 comic books will now come with redemption codes for a digital copy. Download ahoy!

7:20- Beast Boy refrences the Muppet Show 3 times.

7:29- "Fasting" to be a Fast n Furious title.

7:30- Select still doesn't get what "Petite" clothing has to do with being a member of the Addams Family, as half of them are notably tall or fat.

7:32- Final Crisis not being part of the New DC Universe means that the New Gods are still around somewhere :D

7:37- Pink Hood in all DC titles 0__o

7:39- Third Olsen of the Olsen Twins attends NYU

7:42- Javier shows a creepy Thing pic.

7:44- We always made fn o Dan for wearing his Batman mask

7:56- Dan proves that the first Hulk movie is underrated with hard evidence

7:59- Mysterio's fight in the 2nd Spiderman game is the best ever

8:01- IF they make Action Comics #3 like Superman 64, they HAVE Seth's money. EX: Angry Video Game Nerd Review

8:05- Mr Freezes watches Snow Miser

8:06- One issue of the Metal Men has the evil brother of Egg-Fu shows up and made it really racist. Javier to bring it in a future meeting.

8:17- Andrew is calling Mary Jane shallow and Mary Janes says he's just as shallow as she is

8:19- Fire Alarm Went off

8:46- Melody knits a plastic bag.

Well, with the fire alarm we didn't go back into the building and talked about other things in the park (like romance troubles and how I'm somehow Kiff from Futurama and such). Hopefully next meeting there will be more minutes.

Until then,

Select

READ HEPHAESTUS COMICS

Meeting Minutes (9/29/11)

2011-09-30T17:28:00.025-04:00

Select here with the meeting minutes and all that jazz...

SIDE NEWS:

This Saturday, October the 1st, will be 24 Hour Comic Day: founded by Scott McCloud, renowned cartoonist. Information can be found here. While the League isn't planning on anything for this event, we will support all artisans whom are to tackle this collosal task in spirit. :D

MEETING MINUTES:

6:52- Roughly noted, Starfire is a 6'2" Snookie according to Dan

6:53- Wolverine's face melted off

ouch

6:56- You know who speaks in Absolute? THE SITH

6:57- It takes Mike a page to do a panel

7:00- Dan as Mary Jane: I like Catwoman's boobs

7:06- Chess with dice: when you make a move you roll a dice to see if it was a success

7:08- Select swallows a key so no one can get into the Publication lab

7:20- We talk about the Publication and see if we have any awesome volunteers to submit anything

7:26- Comic Book League Reboot: Manhattan Whale walks, Angry Girl is a Peace-loving hippie and Snow Baby is a crack addict

7:28- Metal Men were in the Amalgam Comics merged with the Brotherhood: Will Magnus and Magneto are brothers (thus forming the "Uncanny Brotherhood")

7:35- Today, we're learning about shapes ~Javi with a triangle in half

7:38- We need official club batarangs

7:40- Power Girl is noted for her tit window. Also noting a Mr. Mind Heroclix does in fact exist.

7:43- Now that Courtney is gone, Wendy is the one to be picked on in the club.

7:45- Javier states that baby skins smells like bacon

7:52- The Metal Men make their own troubles close to all the stories they have (16 out of 19 in the collector edition Javier shows)

8:01- Debate: Quebec should succeed from Canada.

8:09- Guy Gardner takes Ice to a strip place/porno theater (run by Black Hand) on their first date

8:18- Mary Jane went as Velma for her High School Halloween

8:23- Brock from Pokemon can smell the differences between women ie Nurse Joy and Officer Jenny

What a pervert schmuck

8:27- Mercury from the Metal Men dressed as Mercury from Sailor Moon

8:29- James Earl Jones was the voice of the baritone Fluttershy (Flutterguy) in My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. 0__o

8:46- MAD has mad bronies

8:57- Jack Kirby is rising from the grave (to attend Comic Con this year)

9:00- Tara Strong voices EVERYTHING

9:15- The Joker picked up Brandon's water bottle

9:23- Mary Jane wants to be Almist

9:26- Back to the Future better than Ghostbusters: At least BTTF had a third movie, a second movie that was actually good and an actual actor from the live-action movie return to reprise a role for the animated series...

9:44- Andrew says Acme Novelty Date Book is not a great book

9:54- We're still here. Select: I'm a Bostonian by blood

9:55- Broke my heart. Interweb: It's just a series of tubes ~Select

10:00- Fanta of the Opera

10:08- Andrew: Sorry Harry, Hermione's still hot :D

10:15- 20 years from now: "PotterHeads"

10:26- We should go to a Quidditch match dressed as Death Eaters/Dementors

10:32- Umbrella Academy= Mary Jane wants to read

Well, that's it for this meeting. Whatever.

Select

Meeting Minutes (9/22/11) HEROCLIX

2011-09-23T11:17:00.024-04:00

Select here,

Last meeting we played a game called Heroclix. :D For those who don't know, Heroclix is basically a board game where you play as figurines of your favorite superheroes (or villains) and face off against a band of villains controlled by a mastermind with other players. So, basically it's a nerd's game about friendship or whatever, but that doesn't mean that it isn't interesting and all :D

By the way, here's a shout out to one of our newer members: Mary Jane, as 9/21/11 was her 18th Birthday. So Happy (Belated) Birthday, MJ!

MEETING MINUTES

7:13- Real Steel = Medabots = Rockem Sockem Robots

7:15- HEROCLIX!

7:19- Mary Janes rips pants on the way to the club, but continues to stay like a real trooper

7:19b- Mary Jane talks at a higher pitch to people when she doesn't know them (thus sounding nicer)

7:24- You can't have 2 Iron Men (Why not?) Because last time they did that they made War Machine

7:35- Still setting up...

7:48- Still waiting to start...

7:52- We can only do 11 things... Javier: We can only have one Thing though...

So, at this point the game begins and here's the set up.

STORY:

There is a heated battle in the Helicarrier for the Chaemeleon (Dmirtri Anatoly Nikolayevich) and his right to marry Spiderman (Peter Parker). However, MODOK and his band of Hydra members alongside the Wrecking Crew and Mr. Hyde and Baron Zemo are all part of the Tea Party and are thus against the idea. So, the battle is for the Civil Liberties of Gay Marriage.

PLAYERS:

Mike as the Evil Characters banning together

Mary Jane as Chaemeleon

Select as Doctor Strange

Will as Ant-Man

Javier as the Thing

Rebekah as Gorilla Man

Andrew as Captain America

Raelle as Moon Knight

Dan as Electro (ie Shock Man)

Aton as the Hulk

Melodie as Psylocke

Armon as Thor

Taimur as Miek

Together, the Heroes form the Pro-Chaemelon League!

8:06- Raggaeman should be a real superhero (With Skaman as his sidekick)

8:11- Electro shocks girl medic. Jerk. He did so Screaming and randomly throwing bolts and all.

8:16- Chaemeleon beaten to an inch of his life. (Mary Jane has a shocked expression)

8:23- Electro electrocuted woman to death cruelly.

8:31- Scifi club wears Mels shirts

8:41- Rebekah and Javi: Adventure Time fanfic: LSP joins a Sorority "Society can't define who I am! Oh my glob!"

8:48- Bulldozer is the Flesh from Kablam

8:51- Good night, Moon Knight (Moon Knight is killed)

8:55- MODOK is Michelle MODOK-mann

9:02- Hulk falls to MODOK

9:11- Chaemeleon outlives the Hulk

9:34- Spiderman, Dragonman, Loki and Batman come out of the Delorean to get at the Pro-Chaemeleon League (though only Loki goes on the field)

9:36- Mr. Hyde is a valued member of the Tea Party

9:46- Thing Falls, though Gorilla Man does massive damage for revenge against MODOK

And some round afterward, the forces of evil were defeated by the heroes. I just forgot to record all that is all... :P

ENDING:

And so, with the fall of MODOK and Loki, Chaemeleon returned from battle scarred and beaten to his Spiderman. They embrace and do an upside-down kiss thing that was so ever popular with the movies and this heals Chaemeleon of his close-to-death wounds. The remaining heroes make their graves for the fallen in this conflict and mourn the loss of their friends. Yet, despite this there was not without happiness, as Chaemeleon and Spiderman finally get their wedding, with the champions of the battle to be there to witness the glorious ocassion. The two then move to Long Island and have 2.3 kids where the gang would return for their baby showers.

However, the heroes must be ever vigilant for the possible future actions of the Tea Party. Depsite this, they all lived Happily Ever After

(that is until the the election of 2012 where they must band together again should the Tea Party take over...)

As a final note, after the villains lost President Mike notice a stone lion and suggested we chuck it over the balcony right next to us and bid to try and vanguish as many sorority girls as we could at the time, as they did steal everything from us. Like lighting it was "Big Trouble in Little Chinatown." "It's all in the reflexex" ~Mike quoteing from said movie.

Well, that's all the insanity for today. I got to go and do stuff.

Select

Club Fest Meeting Minutes (9/6/2011)

2011-09-17T10:17:00.013-04:00

Select here,
For those awesome people who found out about our awesome club from the Club Fest, you may have taken interest in our club with but the two minutes you spent at the table. However, what happened during the other hours that the Club Fest was active? Well, to satisfy no one's curiosity, here's but some of the Not Meeting Minutes But Club Fest Minutes that were recorded first by me then Dan Constales.

CLUB FEST MINUTES

10:34- Mike cuts himself, bleeds excessively but continues on to carry the publication on like a true trooper (That's True Grit there ~Select)

10:48- Mike is proud of comic fan he set up :D

10:57- 900 dollars for razor blades

11:06- Dan had lunch not with Beetle Juice, but within his general facinity.

11:17- Select is going to moonlight for Xiao Wei of the Mathematics Society (go )

11:34- Dan reveals plan for a Gotham City amusement attraction, featuring such oddities like the alley where the Waynes were murdered but with skeletons still there

11:52- I don't think Xiao Wei is coming back...

11:58- Xiao Wei is back :D Wendy is doing a sign for him

12:00- Here comes the crowd! 0__o

12:11- We joke of what would happen if the Suite Life Series' Zack and Cody stars Cole and Dylan Sprouse were to just happen to come to the Comic Book League table.

12:12- We met with the Suite Life of Zack and Cody. One of the Sprouse Twins legitimately interested with our club (I'm sorry to say I can't remember which one) We were stunned for a few moments

I swear they are ninjas. Those two are up to something...

12:30- Something or other...

12:31- hears Pokemon Snap in the Background

12:55- The Magic words to draw peoples' attention is "resume"

1:06- Publicate is indeed a word, at least from now it is

From this point on Dan bothered to do the minutes to some degree. Since he placed me in a bad light, my revenge upon him will be someday soon. I'm not going to say when and where, but trust me when I say that vengeance will be mine.

1:25- Sales pitches are sale pitches

1:30- Select leaves. Traitor.

1:31- Had to explain to Vietnamese Club that Thai club has better hookers.

1:41- EVERYONE CAN EAT S***!

2:48- Eitan Steals Comic Books

Around this point is when President Mike took the Minutes...

5:05- ClusterF*** at the entrance. Rain & Wristbands are bad combination

5:20- WIll is a better prmotion man fro the Math Society than the Math Society. "What kind of calculators you guys got? ...That derivatives, does rights?"

5:32- Will & Mike break off to take over another table thus forming CBL Beta/ The Bay Breeze Boys

5:34- That old magic is kinda there

5:41- The scales goes from Smoking, Sizzling, Well Crafted

5:50- "I gotta deactivate my email!"

5:56- Euclid is shaping up to be a fun character- The Kid Kobra Story lines just keep flowing.

5:58-

6:18- BE RIGHT BACK

And those are the Club Fest Meeting Minutes. Hope you guys enjoyed them. Not that anyone cares anymore or whatever.
~Select

Meeting Minutes 9/15/11

2011-09-15T21:49:00.005-04:00

Select here.
Well, here we are again with the meeting minutes and all that jazz.
Well, let's get this over with.

MEETING MINUTES

6:41-To our North: the Chess Club, To our South: Students for Drug Something Heroine Whatever

6:45- Select: How was your week? Wendy: It's was- (sees someone) Hey! What's up?

6:47- It's depressing Amanda Waller is attractive now.

6:48- Mogo died on Select's Birthday

6:52- It doesn't look like th fun trail mix with M&Ms (Wendy offers trail mix to Dan)

6:58- Soup comes out of Wendy's nose from laughing...

7:07- Dan will be Speedy. Bring a dead cat.

7:10- Will: Galactus joins the Green Lantern Corps.

7:12- Jake: There use to be chicken in this (container), but now there's not.

7:19- Dan: Who cares about Spiderman's parents? Even Spiderman doesn't care about Spiderman parents.

7:24- Will was just singing because everyone was singing

7:25- It's pronounce Swamp-THANG

7:30- Mike: Don't tear up my comics, I paid money for those!

7:32- Red Tornado: OBSERVATION, YOU ARE AN ASSHOLE

7:34- Javier betrays us all

7:35- We steal stuff from the Drug Free Club...

7:38- Please, comics and drugs don't go together! Now go and read the Metal Men ~Javier

7:39- We all want Batman to sit on our faces

7:40- Wendy will turn us into a tree

7:44- Dan rips out Javier's vocal cords

7:50- Wendy will sow Seth in a Lolita dress...

7:50- Andrew has never been in the minutes & thus that goes into the meeting minutes...

7:58- Seth is curious how Gerudos in the Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time reproduce even though they are all female

8:03- Mike: They (all the villains) all love Gorilla Grodd

8:07- Everyone sprinted for the free pizza.

8:12- Gene Simmons worships the devil

8:13- Yoda is Javier's favorite Muppet

8:17- Nigel Thornberry was voiced by Tim Curry

8:19- Arthur taught us animals listen to Reggae

8:23- We rememebr Arthur cartoons

8:26- Select: What else can we remember?

8:31- They took away Michelangelo's num-chunks! ~Mike

8:32- ...Sexy Invisible Woman Statue and I didn't know how to feel about that because Invisible Woman is like my mom ~Seth

8:35- Nelson Mandala doing the Turtle dance

8:38- We're going to summon the spirit of Steve Ditko

8:42- Topcat is Mexico's most popular cartoon

8:43- Faithful Topcat movie to be made in Mexico

8:45- No one called out Jokey Smurf for being a suicide bomber

8:47- Romeo and Cars, MacCarBeth, Much Ado About Cars

8:48-Pope-Mobil in aother Pope-Mobil (bulletproof)

8:49- Andrew may be Bizzaro-Javier

8:51- That's So Raven is a modern version of MacBeth

8:58- Javier, "Let There Be Dinosaurs."

Well, that's that. Now to do something else.
Select

First Meeting Meeting Minutes

2011-09-09T10:04:00.015-04:00

Select here after yesterday's awesome Comic Book League meeting. Unfotunately, this may end the solo meetings for a while as now I have an obligation to make REAL meeting minutes. Nevertheless, these should suffice for your amusement. All you fine, awesome persons who showed up: you're the life blood of our club so thank you for attending and I hope that we've left an interest with you to continue to follow our club. If not, then I hoped you enjoyed yourself nonetheless...

EVENTS

First to get out of the way would be to note the events that are going on relating somewhat to the club. For those of us who like webcomics going printed, boy do we have something for you! The great webcomic Hark! A Vagrant is having a printed publishing event. The series is by the talented Kate Beaton. They're will be hard copy prints to sell and autograph signings, so be sure to check it out!
This event will be hosted at the Housing Works store located at 126 Crosby St. (located South of Broadway and between Lafayette St). The event will be on September 23rd at 7:00PM. And even if you don't want to go to the event, the Housing Works sells ONE DOLLAR COMICS, ALL THE TIME. So be sure to stop by anyway. More information an be found here: http://housingworks.org/

To follow up with that, the great Craig Thompson, who is promoting his latest creation Habibi, is going to be at the Strand near Union Square on September 20th 6:00PM.

While you are not obligated or forced to go to the event, bear in mind that it was Wendy who wants everyone to go, which translated to "Go or you will Die." More information can be found here: http://www.strandbooks.com/index.cfm/fuseaction/event.show/ID/2ec42e56-bcc6-4ba0-9fc0-53b9d0f7347c

Lastly, let's promote a fine artisan who went to our CBL meeting, shall we? One Maggie of NYU has made some webcomics on the tumblr and they are indeed good.

Go check it out if you can here: http://figureof8.tumblr.com/

MEETING MINUTES

7:06- something something beginning

7:07-PIZZA :D

7:08- "Mary Jane doesn't read the comments," Select think out loud...

7:09- Eat Pizza...

7:10- We have more people, new people in fact :D

7:11-7:26- Awkward Intros with the ice breaking are made

7:26- We propose to kill THE Batman.

7:27- Dan takes out notes from his iPhone for a speech

7:28- Some of us are cranky, but it comes with the position of seniority

7:28b- "Cut the shit, Aton" ~Dan

7:29- Macho Man, God rest his soul...

7:29b- We're scary at first, but we grow on you... we're really nice people.

7:30- Dan says people who don't come back to the meetings are like people from Jersey Shore.

7:31- "We may not be the club you need, but we are the club you deserve" ~Dan

7:32- Aton flashes everyone topless.... MUCH emotional scaring begins...

7:55- Maggie is NYU's Quidditch Seeker :D

7:59- The NYU board is discriminatory in that the Quidditch team isn't allowed due to it "Not being a sport or interest group"

8:07- Seth: If I drop out of NYU, will I be an alumni? Majority: YES

8:09- Mary Jane: can't think of something funny because you tell me to say something funny, Select.

8:12- I'm only saying that cause I'm Communist ~Select

8:14- Javier is Dead... to Me ~Select

8:15- Angry Birds the Movie: it will take place in New York City life-action style coming out of the sewers like all animated movies set in New York City nowadays.

8:28- President Mike does the Mario Jump.

8:35- We actually managed to maintain a good number of our freshmen interestees.

8:51- Mary Jane only wanted to be a lawyer because the law building in NYU is pretty and so are are the people in it (ala Legally Blonde)

8:55- It wasn't an ass because it was a horse ~Dan

9:05- "If Satan lived on Earth he would live in Jersey Shore because it's the Devil" ~Anonymous Jersey Shore resident

Well, that's all I got to say for now. Hope next week will be as exciting as this one.
~Select

2011-09-03T16:39:00.001-04:00

Select here.

In my current state of madness as of Thursday September 1^st, being bored out of my mind with the lack of internet at my current airline location, the voices in my head sounding a lot like Mike and the others convinced me to write down the meeting minutes for yet another Emergency Comic Book League meeting since they wouldn’t stop pestering me otherwise. I do not know where do these abominations come from, but I am typing the meetings as they are happening so as to not drift into a more broken state of my psyche. So, with no further things to get in my way, let the second emergency CBL meeting commence.

7:00- voices in my head tell me to write down meeting minutes

7:01- Second emergency CBL meeting is called to order

7:03- Select is scared that Dan can summon demons

7:05- Was there REALLY a demand for OMAC for the New 52?

7:07- Shazam

7:08-Shazam

7:09- Select failed for the fifth time in trying to become Captain Marvel

7:11- Epic Kosher Time = and Falafel ball, and Falafel ball, and Falafel ball, and Falafel ball…

7:13- “Mike,” if that is really Mike, claims to descend from a long line of Italian kingdom saving plumbers

7:15- Wendy has a bloodthirsty look in her eyes, but this is normal even for the real Wendy

7:17- Fake Courtney can bench Aton, Select scared

7:20- Bob Marley is the cure for cancer

7:25- It is not called “Anime,” but “Japanime”

7:28- Aslan is on the move

7:30- Adam West is the best batman ever

7:32- The meeting minutes notes in two minutes are false

7:34- The previously stated meeting minutes notes two minutes ago are true

7:37- “Javier” is the spawn of Chuck Norris

7:40- Select is outraged that the so called “Human Centipede” movie doesn’t actually have a set of humans with 100 appendages (therefore a true centipede) and demands to be compensated for this poor state of affairs

7:43- Select realizes that Marvin the Martian is black

7:46- 1.21 Jigawatts

7:49- although manga is updated weekly and American comics are updated monthly (according to story arc), both ironically take about a year to finish up story arcs that no one likes

7:52- Whatever Happened to Robot Jones?

7:55- Spiral Knights is the best free-to-play MMO that Select has played

7:58- Select points out that Team Fortress 2 isn’t an MMO despite having a trade system and cash-shop system

8:00- Select pictures Crumb’s “Book of Genesis Illustrated” had it been done in Crumb’s normal style…

8:03- Will is somehow this Earth’s Ant-Man

8:06- Taimur is somehow this Earth’s Spiderman

8:10- Select is sad since he has no counterpart…

8:13- Select pictures Mike Tyson’s Punch Out if it was done as a Saturday morning cartoon

8:17- If you’re a murder who killed two parents and left a kid an orphan, realize that you just might have created Batman should you let the kid live…

8:20- Select realizes the previous statement is insensitive, and does not endorse the message. After all, it is the message of the crazy voices in his head as opposed to him.

8:24- Select wishes that Brentalfloss would do a “With Lyrics” about Castlequest.

8:27- Contrary to popular belief, the Comic Book League talks about other things than comic books…

8:30- If an animator makes cartoons, and a cartoonist makes comics, and a comic tells jokes, then does that mean one who animates is a “joke teller?”

8:33- Not real Mike is somehow the Dungeon Master of this reality

8:36- Laptop computers will literally burst into flames if not cared for correctly

8:40- All that the East Coast is missing now in terms of natural disasters is a volcanic eruption :D

8:43- No one remembers Bulletman

8:45- The voices in Select’s head finally gave up on tormenting him

So there you have it folks. By the time you read this, Select (I) would have been sedated and cared upon for the madness that happened. Hopefully, it won’t happen again. But, who’s to say?

Select+

Remembering Ending DC Comics

2011-08-27T17:46:00.005-04:00

Select here.
Well, with September coming soon, there is something other than the return to college/school that is going to affect some of us Comic Book League people... With September comes the end of Flashpoint and the beginning of the "totally not a reboot" DC Comics - The New 52.

For those cool cats who aren't familiar of what's happening, apparently the Flash (a superhero that runs really fast) and his enemy the Reverse Flash (a super villain who also runs really fast) pulled some kind of Back to the Future on us all and jacked up the timeline of the DC universe. This makes it so that the most jacked up scenario could possibly happen in the DC universe did happen: like the Amazons and Atlanteans jacking everything up and Cyborg of the Titans becoming a major hero. Now, the Flash has to fix this by running really fast or going back to the future or whatever (1.21 JIGAWATTS!!!)

But enough of that, what's important is what's to come after that, the beginning and end of some comic series. Although I personally am looking forward to seeing some of the series they are to publish (Static Shock and Blue Beetle), the casualties are that of seeing some comics I actually liked coming to an end. And so, here's to commemorate the now ending comics DC decided to cancel. These are but some of the ones I've read (and I know that DC made a lot of other great titles as well but these are the ones I've personally read regularly):

Justice League: Generation Lost - Well, not to be a spoil sport, but I was kind of wishing to see some more conflict to come out of Maxwell Lord, since they bothered to bring him BACK FROM THE FRIGGIN DEAD and all. Granted, a lot of the characters from JL:GL will be showing up in the new Justice League International, but for me it feels like they're making a whole different comic with just the same characters. While it was true that the series ended on April 2011, it also holds true that the reboot will guarantee that nothing will follow from this. My guess is that the new JLI will feature nothing but "team spirit build up" for months. It'd take years for them to get back to the Justice League group I know and love. I could be wrong and I could like the new JLI more than Generation Lost, but as of now all I can do is bid Generation Lost a bitter farewell...

Zatanna - While there is magic to speaking backwards, there was also magic for me with how enjoyable the Zatanna comics were. I personally didn't read many sorcerer-based comics until picking up this comic series, so it's kind of sad for me to see a magic-based superhero book canceled right when I was getting into it. With this series, we learned so much about Zatanna besides being a friend of Batman and the daughter of father Zatara. For example, I found it interesting when they introduced Zatanna's crippling fear of puppets, which ultimately manifests when a cursed puppet tries to get back at her for what her father did to said puppet. (let's hope she never has to perform at the Muppet's theater...) While I don't have to worry about her disappearing into obscurity (Justice League Dark), it's kind of sad to see her loose the spotlight. Not to mention the unsatisfying end of her book was unsatisfying (the last comic wasn't supposed to be as New 52 was planned without most people's knowledge). The stories were mystifying and the humor great, so as I remember this series all I have to say is "Sknaht rof eht shgual, Annataz."

Power Girl - I was thoroughly surprised to learn that DC isn't going to have Power Girl show up in any of their titles (even the Superman-oriented ones), let alone let her keep her comic. It's one thing to cancel a character's book and then shoving them into a team-based comic, but what I feel sad about is that they decided not to show PG in any way. Granted, her back story was kind of hard to follow for some viewers (she's a Silver Age Super Girl or something) but I think that's the only reason why she's not back. Unlike the other Kryptonian comics, Power Girl's silly tales always seem to grab my attention more (and it's not because of her costume whole). For example, I remember a funny tale when some punk kid bribed her with embarrassing photos and all he wanted her to do was make him more popular with the kids at school. Granted, if I were given some leverage to bribe a super heroine, it would turn out much differently.................................................................................................................................
I would make her punch Bruno Mattei in the face. Her series, like Zatanna, ended with not much satisfaction but at least it ended better (in an ironic sort of way). But anyway, it feels as though Power Girl's constant stream of survival is indeed ended with her book ending and Power Girl loosing her spotlight as a stand-alone heroine. I just hope that we'll be able to see her again some time in the future.

The Great Ten (Issue 10 of 10) - Remember when I said that they would bring most characters back from JL:GL to JLI? I said most because they decided to drag characters from other books into the Justice League International title. One of whom is Augustine General in Iron of the Great Ten. What does this means to me? It kind of means that the Great Ten might possibly no longer exist in the new DC Universe. While I did find it slightly... biased in cultural direction, the Great Ten was one of the few Chinese superhero teams to come out so I readily embraced it (though let me say that not all Chinese heroes have to be based on obscure mythology or Communism or based on government control. Some can just simply be heroes who happen to be Chinese. Just saying...). As a Chinese American of all people, to see a Chinese super hero team taken away is sad. Granted, the reboot might have nothing to do with the fact that the tenth book of the series never got released (ending on issue 9 near the end), but mankind needs something to complain about from time to time...

The Justice Society of America - With the reboot comes DC's desire to make there only one...two Justice-based groups. Thus, the two Justice Leagues will be the only ones they plan to be the "first." What does this mean? It means that the old school Golden Age group that is the JSA make indeed be screwed over. Most recently, the last issue of JSA was released, but unlike Zatanna or Power Girl it seems like they actually planned an ending of some sort. Let's just say that they are emphasizing some aspects of the new DC universe over the others by...getting rid of some characters. Granted, in the continuity of things the JSA may still exist in the new DC universe, but it could also hold that they no longer are together as, you know, JSA has World War 2 super heroes in it. Worse case scenerio is that we don't see characters like Jay Garrick (Flash) and Rick Tyler (Hourman) in the limelight since they would be in their 80's or 90's by the reboot time. It's sad to see comic book history's first super hero team also to be the first to go in the reboot...

Booster Gold- Fittingly, Booster Gold seems to be treated with the same scorn and lack of appreciation with his series' handling as the hero himself as portrayed with close to all the times he's shown in any DC animated series. While Booster's intentions of being a super hero were indeed sketchy (to be rich and famous and stuff), he did eventually become a hero onto himself as his character developed. He's not a goody goody two shoe like Superman or Captain Marvel, but he's a hero when he needed to be. Plus, Booster's involvement with the DC time stream was always interesting to see for me. In fact, him being a time traveler is what made him keep his memory of the "old" DC universe in Flashpoint and maybe through the new DC universe. Ironic that he of all people would remember the DC universe as we knew it before. He's going to be part of the new JLI, so it's not like we're not seeing him anymore. However, to see his solo series gone due to Flashpoint boils my blood a little...

Ghost Sweeper Mikami- One of my favorite comics of all time. Ghost Sweeper Mikami was the closest thing to the Ghostbusters Japan had to offer, and with comedy and T&A to boot! After all, everyone loves Comedy! (and T&A) This in fact influenced my views on comic narration that episodic and character driven subplots could indeed carry a series for many years, and I find no other comic series did it better than this. The dramatic moments were tense, the comedy light and the romantic tensions between Yokoshima (the male apprentice) with Mikami (our misery protagonist) and Okinu (their ghost friend, who's the Slimer of the series) was indeed the best parts of the series. And- What's that? This has nothing to do with the DC reboot? In fact, this has nothing to do with DC and American comics in general? TO HELL WITH YOU, this is my favorite manga of all time and I'll be damned if I let anyone talk bad about it.

Well, that's all I have to say about now. Until next time...
Select

Summer Time Meeting Minutes (the meeting no one went to (8/25/2011))

2011-08-25T11:10:00.029-04:00

Select here.
As I was impatient with waiting for the lame semester to begin, I decided to hold an emergency Comic Book League meeting in my own home. Granted, there weren't any CBL members in my general vicinity, so numbers were understandably... low. However, I made due and tried my best to keep the meeting together with the few members who were here (which numeric digit would be what you kids call some new aged number called "none")

7:00- Select decided to start CBL meetings

7:01- CBL meetings begin

7:03- Introductions are made, though this was short this year

7:05- Talk about publication or whatever, though understandably nothing is finalized

7:10- We realize that no one's going to talk about the publication even on regular meetings

7:15- Dragon Quest 6 was all Milly's fault, as with Dragon Quest Monsters

7:20- Thinking a way back from Mars

7:22- watched Wonder Woman's introduction to Batman: the Brave and the Bold 5 times

7:35- Tried to recite the Green Lantern Oath Zatanna-backwards style to see if anything cool happens

7:36- We accidentally summoned a demon from the infernal realms who wanted our marriage

7:37- We challenged said demon to a musical stand off even though none of us were married

7:40- Anti-climatic ending as the demon didn't know how to play an instrument (I guess vocals are more focused on in Hell)

7:45- Select realizes Oedipus was a tragedy

7:48- "Free to play games are the most expensive games out there in the market"

7:50- Select's drawing of Wonder Woman scares little girls

The horror! The Silver-Age based horror!

7:55- Select makes a horrible reattempt in recreating a failed web series he tried years before

8:00- the ghosts of Phil and Courtney and Taimur haunted the meeting even though all three people are alive and well (maybe it's some ghosts with identity issues)

8:03- Select begins reading passages from "The Quotations of Chairman Mao Zedong" for all to hear

8:07- Select is never to pick things to read out loud ever again

8:13- Doctor Strange is a proctologist

8:16- Select still doesn't believe Duke Nukem Forever is released even though he just saw someone beat it with his own eyes

8:20- They call him "Silent" Bob for a reason and this "but Deadly" reason isn't because he doesn't talk much...

8:24- In the upcoming 2012 elections, be sure to vote for Max for president

Most trustworthy candidate for President EVER

8:30- Manhattan Whale sends us his regards from his secret Whale cave in Lower Manhattan

8:33- There now lingers a deep philosophical question the CBL must tackle: do Werecats use Werecat litter in their litter boxes or regular cat litter?

8:37- Select gives up and decides to cancel the meetings then and there: thus ending the emergency CBL meeting at his place

Well, that's all for now folks. Hopefully, the real meeting minutes on the real meetings aren't going to be as ridiculous and what we've seen here (or maybe they're going to be more ridiculous, who's to say?)

Until later,
Select

First Post in a While

2011-08-22T02:54:00.009-04:00

Hi all,
This is Selecthumor aka Michael Cheung. As Secretariot (Secretary) for the NYU Comic Book League for this year, it is my responsibility or whatever to keep this site alive somehow with random tidbits of info and the like. I hope you all had an excellent summer, as I indeed did. Can't wait to get the meetings back on track when the year begins.

First on the agenda is to let you all know that as Secretariot of the CBL, I will more likely go mad with power and abuse my democratically elected position to beat down any competition and to rule with an iron fist: but let me assure you that this phenomena is indeed normal and in fact inevitable with such a position. Now you may be thinking to yourselves "Select, that sounds silly. Secretary's can't go mad with power and rule with an iron fist." You know who people said the same thing about? Joseph Stalin. That's right. Stalin. Bet Trotsky didn't see that coming several kilometers away...

Let this serve as a friendly reminder to never underestimate Secretaries...

But a little about myself, I'm just your average Asian American who draws his own webcomic series. I guess this is the best time if any for my first act of abusing my power: so here's some adverts to my work

The above link goes to the Smackjeeves website. If you hate Smackjeeves for some odd reason, here's a link to the same thing by Drunkduck.com:

If you wish to see what other things I do, check out my DeviantArt account.

Well, besides that, more things are to come when the year begins. Hopefully to return are the meeting minutes of old: where the actions of the CBL are recorded for all to gawk, I mean admire. More cool things are to come.

Sincerely,
Select

The Comic Book League Remembers: "Macho Man" Randy Savage

2011-05-24T13:22:00.007-04:00

If you didn't know by now, the "Macho Man" Randy Savage has tragically passed away. Yes, the world famous wrestling superstar and pop culture icon has left this mortal realm all too soon. His death came as a surprise to everyone, especially The Comic Book League. "Macho Madness", if you will, took The CBL by storm this semester and Randy Savage's presence is certainly noticeable in our Spring publication; unfortunately, since the publication had already been finalized by the time of Randy Savage's passing, we were not able to add a memorial page acknowledging his passing. Instead, we're taking it to The CBL blog -this impromptu memorial to the cream of the crop, "Macho Man" Randy Savage.

The Craig Thompson-inspired artwork comes courtesy of The CBL's own "Fancier" Dan Costales. It was drawn earlier in the semester when "Macho Madness" was starting to take over The CBL. "Macho Man" Randy Savage was to us, like so many fans, a truly fascinating and inspiring figure -an uninhibited, pure soul, riding the edge of a lightening bolt across the sky, launching himself from the heights of the top rope to deliver a "Macho Elbow" of excitement onto the lives of millions. He was a true showman and competitor in and out of the ring, sharing his unbridled energy and flamboyant liveliness with the public at large, whether it was his wrestling promos, his historic "Slim Jim" television advertisements, or his voice-over and film work.

I just wanted to take this moment to honor the life of a truly amazing man because we tend to take figures like Randy Savage for granted until it's too late. He lived his life to the fullest on his own terms and he always spoke from the heart. It's incredibly tragic to know that he's gone, but as long as we have our memories of him, as long as we take the time to really stop and listen to what he was saying, what he was sharing -his unique personal philosophy -his spirit will live on. We can learn to "spice up" our lives, to be the best person we can be and to live life without limits, letting go and doing it when the moment comes, disregarding the constraints of everyday expectations.

We can be comforted in knowing that the "beat goes on" and that "Macho Man" Randy Savage was our friend and he'll always be with us, looking down from the stars. That's what he was, is and will be -that one star shining in the night, brighter than all the others. Dig it, Oooooh yeaaaaah!

CBL- Now Endorsed by Greg Pak

2011-04-18T00:06:00.004-04:00

Last Sunday April 10th at MoCCA, your intrepid and ever faithful CBL member for life (TAIMUR!) went to get the CBL name out there. And after a little "wheeling and dealing" proud to say writer/filmmaker/Rhodes Scholar Greg Pak whose credits include Incredible Hulk, Magneto: Testament, Hercules, has given his 'endorsement' for the CBL.

Front Page News

2011-01-24T17:06:00.004-05:00

Hey! I bet you thought this blog was dead, didn't ya? Or at the very least, that it had become a depository for the latest Emma Stone/Spider-man reboot news? Yes and no. We were on winter break, but now we're back...kind of...a little bit...and we're looking forward to the shining prospect that is the Spring semester. We're mostly looking forward to more awkward sexual innuendo and obscure pop culture jokes.

If you didn't already know, NYU's local paper, The Washington Square news did a piece on The Comic Book League and we made the front page! Well, the lower bottom half of the front page, but front page nonetheless -that's got to count for something! So, if you haven't already read the hard copy (c'mon, like, almost everybody on campus religiously reads The WSN...I mean, nobody I know does, but I'm sure there are a few who do), or checked it out here, then here's a copy-and-paste job.

A different kind of Justice League

December 1, 2010
by Cory Stieg

In an age ruled by video games and television, NYU's Comic Book League is fighting to keep the retro comic book tradition alive. The Comic Book League is a club for anyone with a passion for comics, from manga to Marvel.

Courtesy of Dan Costales

CBL meets every Thursday at 7:30 p.m. in the Kimmel Center Lounge

Formerly named "Bags n' Boards," a reference to the plastic bags comics are stored in, the CBL began in 2005 as a small group of comic book fans. Since then, the league has expanded dramatically. Alums from the club have gone on to intern at comic publishing companies such as DC and Marvel, putting the club in a league of its own.

They meet every Thursday at 7:30 p.m. in the Kimmel Center Lounge. At the end of each semester, they publish a student-written and student-drawn compilation of comics, which are free and available on the seventh floor of Kimmel. Anyone in the league is welcome to submit their own comics, giving them the professional experience of working on a comic book.

"[We're] allowing someone with an interest in comics, dramatic writing, art or editing, to try it out to see if they like it or to continue to better their craft and collaborate with new people," Michael Coppola, junior and treasurer of the CBL said.

Twice a semester the CBL invites a guest speaker to the meetings. In the past they've had Alan Robert, author and illustrator of the graphic novel "Wire Hangers," as well as Marvel assistant editor Michael Horwitz.

Along with creating its own comic book, the CBL is supporting the comic book industry, one that has suffered a great loss in the past five years.

"The comic book industry is dying, and it's aware it's dying," Tisch freshman David Jacobs said. "And this awareness is accelerating the fact. For whatever reason, people just don't read comics anymore."

Publishing companies have taken extra strides to ensure that their comics are accessible in this digital age. Applications for the iPhone and iPad have been developed so that comic aficionados can conveniently store their favorite comics on their phones. Likewise, the Internet has allowed fans to find rare comics, as well as manage their collection of books.

"As someone who had tons and tons of single issues and I have to buy long boxes to store them, I'm like 'Yes, please!' Put things on digital so that it's easier to organize, easier to store and find," said Gallatin senior and president of the CBL, Courtney Woods.

There is an ongoing debate on whether or not putting comics online defeats the purpose of a comic book. But comics as a classic form of entertainment are being kept alive by dedicated fans like the members of the League.

"Comics can get away with so much ridiculousness that would never fly in a novel, movie or TV show, and other genres can get away with things comics can't," CAS junior Wendy Xu said. "But I like the things comics can get away with better."

When asked why students should join the CBL, Woods was clear.

"It's accepting, it's open and it's a league."

A version of this article appeared in the Thursday, Dec. 2 print edition. Cory Stieg is a staff writer. E-mail her at features@nyunews.com.

So there you have it! Well, besides the fact that we meet at 7:00, not 7:30, that we're not a Justice League in any sense, and that there's a direct quote from some random freshman (c'mon, who believes anything a freshman says?!) that the medium which we gather to admire, discuss, and labor towards is DYING, which, y'know, kind of makes it seem that we're an admirable bunch of students living in denial -it's fine piece of publicity for The Comic Book League. Maybe we'll get some members out if it...God knows we could use them...I'm rambling again. Anyway, welcome back to The Comic Book League!

EMMA STONE CHANGES HAIR!

2010-12-20T00:42:00.019-05:00

Great Scott, comic fans!

Or as the infamous web-crawler exclaims himself, “Holy Toledo, my spider-burrito™!”

New pictures have surfaced from some premiere thing of the one and only Emma Stone with her hair bleached back to her original color for her role as Gwen Stacy in the reboot of the spectacular Spider-man franchise, that unholy, jaw-dropping creation of comic-makers Stan Li and Bill Finger! That was a mouthful!

The internet is a buzz! Look at this girl! She has blonde hair!

It’s a marvelous time to be alive, spider-fans! Imagine all those children reading the Spider-man comics back in 1928, when the character was first created, they’ll never get to see Emma Stone’s hair color! They’re dead!

One comment I heard while “trolling” the web was that Emma Stone looks as smooth and clean-cut as a Jack Kirby drawing, and I have to say, the resemblance is uncanny!

But with this cavalcade of historic comic-book news, a new set of photos have been released of the other cast members of this Spider-man reboot-phenomenon with their new hairstyles! And I have the scoop right here first! It is unbelievable!

ANDREW GARFIELD

Young and hip, fresh off the set of Justin Timberlake’s Social-Network, Andy, as his friends call him, is stylin’ a whole new hairdo, straight outta the comics! I can hear the ghost of creator Stan Li now! He’s saying, “Help me! For the love of God help me out of this box! Oh, boo hoo!”

RHYS IFANS

We have a new super villain on our hands, and with a new super villain we’re gonna need a new haircut! Our skippy foreign gentlemen, fresh off the set of some film I never heard of is up to bat to bring new life to the classic Spider-man villain, the Riddler! Hoo-ha! Riddle me that!

SALLY FIELDS

Look at these cookies. You’re staring at the new Aunt May, Peter Parker’s caretaker and moral-nuisance. Can she show Spider-man that responsibility can truly make a difference to those inner city youths and win the league championships? I don’t know. I don’t know who this character is, I don’t know. Can’t wait to see this fresh face on billboards though!

SPIDER-MAN

Hey, look! Spider-man is getting in on the action! What a rascal! Originality!

MOLEMAN

Back on the scene and ready to cause trouble! What’s Moleman’s role! I don’t know. I honestly don’t know… Oh, Christ, oh, God… Jesus, help me…

TOBEY MAGUIRE

Hey! You get out of here! You had your shot! And you blew it! You lost everything that night in Vegas! What? You didn’t know I was there? Of course I was there, in the shadows, martini in hand, camcorder in the other! I saw everything! And it’s all on tape! I’ll ruin you! I’LL RUIN ALL OF YOU!

And now, Ladies and gentlemen, the Lizard pictorial spread:

MERRY HOLIDAYS.

--fancier dan

CBL Christmas, continued

2010-12-09T17:42:00.007-05:00

More Christmas songs, CBL-ified! As you can tell, I'm studying really hard for finals >_<.

Spider Bells

City sidewalks, busy sidewalks

Dressed in holiday style

In the air there’s a feeling of Christmas

But villains laughing, bad guys passing

Evil smile after smile

But on ev’ry street corner you’ll see

Spider-man, Spider-man

Friendly neighborhood superhero

Swinging here, swinging there

Soon it’ll be safe Christmas Day.

Strings of cobwebs

Make ‘em stop dead

No more crime on the streets

Sorry, Doc Ock

And Kingpin and Hammerhead

Goblin’s vanquished

Lizard’s been squished

Sandman’s been swept away

And above all this bustle

You’ll see

Spider-man, Spider-man

It’s Christmas time in the city

Swinging here, swinging there

He's made it safe Christmas Day.

Watchmen Night

The Comedian dies one quiet night

Rorschach creeps, he’s a fright

No one believes his theory

Even his friends are weary

They say the Watchmen are done

Silent night, holy night

All is calm, all is bright

Then, a building fire starts

Nite Owl and Silk Spectre race to their parts

They’ll go to save the people

They’ll go to save the peace

Silent night, holy night

Dr. Manhattan shows his might

Once Laurie leaves him, he feels out of place

He flees humanity for outer space

She has to beg him to save Earth

She has to make him return.

Silent night, holy night

The Watchmen discover the end is nigh

Ozymandias planned genocide

Blaming Jon and making him hide

All in the name of peace

Silent night, holy night

Rorshach thinks this can’t be right

He wants to tell the world the real truth

But everyone knows that’d end in bad news

So Dr. Manhattan must kill him.

And so his story ends.

Sorry I can't sing (Silent Night, on hindsight, is really freaking high haha). Anyway, hope you guys feel like coming up with some of your own! CBL Christmas Album, anyone? Sure beats Mariah Carey.

CBL Christmas!

2010-12-09T03:47:00.003-05:00

Happy holidays everyone! In the spirit of the season, Melodie and I decided to make up our own lyrics for popular Christmas songs...

12 Days of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas the CBL gave to me...
1) Taimur dancing naked and free
2) dirty drawings
3) tawdry jokes
4) Eitan slappings
5) Green Lantern rings
6) meeting minutes
7) rooftop parties
8) threats of burning
9) whales in wheelchairs
10) creepy 'staches
11) Southern scoldings
12) post-club outings

and you have this lovely video of us singing it for you so you can sing along! (we posted it before we could become horribly mortified at our voices/appearances/oh my god it is late) soooo... enjoy!

The Christmas Song

Will’s pals drinking by an open fire

Wendy Xu whipping naughty bros

Yuletide carols being sung by Taimur

And Dan mocking the Marvel hoes

Ev’rybody knows Jack Daniels and some mistletoe

Help keep Courtney’s spirits bright

Andrew & Mel with their eyes all aglow

Will keep Wendy from sleeping tonight

They know the publication’s on its way

Mike’s put in lots of hours every day

And at a Jersey desk, a reporter writes

“Oh, how I wish the CBL was here tonight!”

And so we’re offering you this silly tune

To kids, to whales, to were-cats too

Since winter break is upon us so soon

Merry Christmas

A Comic Book League Christmas

Merry Christmas to you.

Happy holidays, ladies and gents!

I created a D&D character...

2010-11-09T12:45:00.004-05:00

I, a gentleman of the world as I see it, have never played Dungeons & Dragons. Recently I was asked to take part in such a game, that at first seemed admirable but then escalated to a responsibility of out of control inbox-proportions.

I, myself still a gentleman, take very few things seriously. But as I continued to receive messages about scheduling conflicts, where to play, and excessive character background before a single session transpired, I decided to take a stand—if I were to take one thing to my icy heart, it would be my D&D (Dungeons and Dragons Roleplaying Quest-game Recreation) character. What started out as a light fiction grew into a work that excelled past three in the morning.

I actually sent the following to the group's facebook message inbox. I mean every word of it.

here's my character:

Name—Brigan Madrok, son of Crogteeth the Maleficent
Race—half-man, half-elf, part-box turtle—ALL COP.
Class—fishmonger
Mood—smarmy, counts on weather
Alignment—straight

Born from the womb of an unknown woman-creature, Madrok was cast unto the wilderness once the doctor removed said baby from the womb—he was disgusted, he threw said baby into the hypodermic needle bin, then discarded said hypodermic needles into a bush just yonder his office building complex by the highway, next to Ye Olde Days Inn. As just a babe and his uncut umbilical cord, he was alienated from civilization, facing prejudiced and indifferent looks at every visit of the local peasant IHOP. Madrok walked the pathways and forded many rivers, dragging his umbilical cord along with him. Once ambushed by a posse of bandits and held at knifepoint, to distract such treacherous fiends, Madrok took hold of his bodily cord and blew into it, surprised to hear angelic noises flow outwards like that of the gentlest flute or similar brass instrument. He himself, as stated before, still a babe at four months, astounded the bandits, and they fled off into the deepest part of the woods, never to be seen again; except for Frik Johnson, the lumber mill master’s boy who traveled back to his parent’s cottage to re-evaluate himself—once at home he questioned the path he had chosen, was able to get an apprenticeship at his father’s mill and developed a strong work ethic—while at a lunch break at Ye Olde Applebee’s with his fellow co-workers several weeks following his hiring, his hardened eyes laid upon the server who brought him his mozzarella sticks, never had he met such a beauty before—their relationship staggered at first, but it soon blossomed into something beautiful, they took walks along the brook, danced together at the squire’s under-the-sea themed ball/wine mixer, and experienced each other’s flesh for the first time under the moonlight of an August sky in the backseat of a Volvo—when the test was positive, they were shocked, “Should we keep it?” asked Frik, “Nothing would make me happier to see you as the father of our child,” said Salinthor the waitress, they embraced as Frik said, “Never let me go, never let me go,” a tear rolled down his young face—the wedding was fit for a lumber miller’s son, and that’s just what it really was, and a boy named Frik Jr. followed months afterward, and then a daughter, and then two more sons after that—Frik’s and Salinthor’s wages eventually were able to sustain the family’s upkeep, they purchased a cottage near the brook they took walks along, near a beautiful flower patch full of flowers that expressed every trim of the rainbow—“I want to be a knight, daddy!” Junior once chimed in, putting a worried expression on Frik’s face while reading the paper one Saturday morning, he looked to his spouse and she only smiled, “Lucharen wants to be an alchemist, wanting to be a knight is not much different,” she soothed, and the next morning Junior found a bundled-up package of shiny, armor lying on his bed—“I’m sorry to report this to you Mr. and Mrs. Johnson,” said the solemn squire holding up Junior’s no longer shining armor as he handed it to the parents with their kingdom’s flag draped over it, “His sacrifice was for the good of the king, and all his people,” but this didn’t stop the two parents from weeping—old age came, and with it more diseases that little control existed for, as Salinthor’s legs became weaker and weaker, much like her father’s did before her, and as the wrinkles increased, her ability to walk didn’t—“Take me to the flower patch,” she asked her husband, he did this, he lowered her down to the earth and she sighed, “the children all grew up and left us, now it is only us, but not for long,” Frik grasped her hands longingly and spoke, “If we only live one life, then a life with you is worth all the flowers on every flower patch in all the land,” a tear rolled down her withered cheek, they expressed their love for one another, and she sunk her head slowly into his lap for the last time—Frik lived for only a week more once Salinthor was gone, there was nothing left for him but to join his loved one beyond the stars.
So from that day onward, Madrok swung his umbilical cord to-and-fro, defending himself from all attacks, and playing the cord like Pan played his flute to enchant woodland creatures and randy nymphs. Following this, he received a rash around his umbilical cord from dragging it across the ground, which developed into an infection; which soon appeared to be a nasty bout of the plague. He died soon afterward. He was four and a half months old. THE END.

And thus ends the greatest story every told.

Here is a bonus, thanks to Everything is Terrible, accurately titled Defenestration the Movie:

DEFENESTRATION THE MOVIE from Everything Is Terrible! on Vimeo.

fancier dan, out.

CBL Movie/Event Review: Rifftrax LIVE! House on Haunted Hill

2010-11-04T15:09:00.006-04:00

After the incredible bummer that was the previous week's meeting (I won't go into it) and the fact that Halloween was no more than a few mere days away, I was definitely excited to go see Rifftrax LIVE! House on Haunted Hill. I had seen a trailer for the event before "Let Me In" earlier that month and I knew that the combination of MST3K-styled riffing and one of my favorite childhood horror movies (kids have those, right?) was something not to be missed. Rifftrax, for those of you unfamiliar, is a group consisting of the former stars of the excellent cult-classic television series "Mystery Science Theater 3000" (Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy, & Bill Corbett). They're riffing, except that they aren't limited to cheesy sci-fi and horror B-movies anymore. No, they also do commentaries for next generation of cheesy sci-fi and horror B-movies, like "Transformers" movies and "Clash of the Titans", in addition to a treasure trove of awfully weird film shorts and public service films.

This was as the title implies a live riff session simultaneously broadcast to theaters across the country. They've done these live events in the past, for such cult-classic staples as "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians", "Plan 9 from Outer Space", and "Reefer Madness". In addition to the main features, they include a number of different shorts, which are loosely connected to the "theme", if you will, of the event.

We got a fanciness-hating grocery witch and a demonic, talking paper bag. Spooky? Maybe. Disturbing? You betcha. Before the show started, though, they projected some "Rifftrax Facts", a series of jokes parodying those awful movie facts (Do I really care which Hollywood leading man has a law degree? No...but just so y'know, it's Gerard Butler), set to the groovy sounds of their Rifftones songs.

The first short, "Magical Disappearing Money" (or the billion dollar stimulus package) was a full-on 70's piece, complete with mutton chop bears and garish wardrobes. It features a penny-pinching witch hanging around a grocery store and trying to get people to consider "smart" inexpensive alternatives to their "fancy" food choices, which translates to shopping as if you were living during war-time rationing. The crew had great riffs for this one, including some great demonic voices for the grocery witch and a funny, but obvious Christine O'Donnell crack. I felt right at home and any doubts I had about the guys' riffing abilities post-MST3K were put to rest.

Then, comedian Paul F. Tompkins came out and did a couple of minutes of stand-up about the standard"monster popping up in the bathroom mirror" scare in horror movies. Good stuff, but I really liked how he lampooned the same lame response actors give interviewers about horror movies ("I did this movie because I think we all like to be scared") -it's a pet peeve of mine. Anyway, the next short, entitled "Paper & I" was hilarious, though, not so much for the riffs (there was a great Ents reference from Tompkins and a joke about a young David Lynch). The reason why it worked well was because it was so damned absurd and disturbing. Essentially, a kid is talked to by a paper bag with a cartoon face who flies him to the South, in the middle of the night, to show him how paper is made and tell him in excruciating detail about the paper production process. Things got really weird when it became clear that the bag was dying and so, to teach everyone a lesson about how important paper is, the bag makes all the paper/paper products in the world disappear. In the end, the kid, Willy, blows up the bag and pops him. I really hope that they post this one online soon because my description hardly does the creepiness of the talking paper bag any justice.

Finally, the main feature began and well, it was pretty damned good. The movie didn't stand up as well as I remembered it as a kid, but then again, I didn't really expect it to. Actually, seeing it again after so many years reminded me that as a kid, I could see the overall narrative problems of pacing and structure, though I probably didn't use those terms (Maybe I did. I don't know; I could tell the movie started to get boring). It lacked towards the end, with certain repetitive jokes getting to be just that: repetitive and stale, but that's because the movie itself starts to suffer from the fact that people spend far too long going in and out of rooms and talking. When the action does pick up, say, with a skeleton marionette, the "good stuff" shows back up again. Highlights included drunk Frank Lloyd, Vincent Price uttering the line "It's close to midnight..." and the subsequent brief, a cappella breakdown of "Thriller", "Seditives", and an extended "LLLLLadies" from the hero/pervert of the film. My personal favorites were the quick, little jokes that come with a quick cut, like "David Bowie" when it cut between characters, or "I'm all set for the first 2 days of Hanukkah-YES!".

All in all, it was a very fun experience. I laughed. I laughed hard. To be honest, I haven't laughed like that in a good while. It brought me right back to those Saturday mornings watching "The Screaming Skull" or "Prince of Space" on "Mystery Science Theater 3000" on the Sci-Fi Channel (not SyFy, ya god-damned green bastards). My face was sore and I was happy. All the stress of midterms, papers, and dealing with "artists" (if you know what I mean and I think you do) disappeared -and it was a great way to kick off the Halloween weekend. In the end, I'm glad that I decided to make the extra effort to go see Rifftrax LIVE! and I'm glad that the rest of The Comic Book League decided to join me because we definitely all had a great time.

That's why I'm giving Rifftrax LIVE! House on Haunted Hill 4 stars. I'd tell you to check it out, but it was a live event, so you can't. You can however go to the Rifftrax website and purchase the riff commentary for the film, as well as the short "Magical Disappearing Money". It was available for free download along with the other "digital goodies", but alas, I never did and now its gone because they're selling it. Besides, if I did and posted it here, it would probably get taken down, like the Youtube version. I'd also suggest you think about going to the next Rifftrax LIVE! event -I guarantee that you'll have an excellent time.

Night of the Living Fanboy or 2 Minutes to 10:30 (10/21/10)

2010-11-04T13:49:00.005-04:00

7:05 -Violent outbreak in The CBL? Zombie virus!

7:06 -Kick-Ass 616 according to Selecthumor and Andrew

7:12 -A CBL Christmas Carol

7:16 -When's a great time to jump into Spider-man? This November -BIG TIME!

7:17 -Geoff Johns' letters printed in the back of old DC Comics is proof that all of your fanboy story ideas can come true

7:19 -Tom Bosley is dead...Tom Bosley is DEAD!

7:20 -"Shoot Henry Winkler"

7:22 -"Kraft Macaroni & Cheese" -Taimur wins the meeting

7:24 -Billy Joel biopic starring Michael Keaton

7:27 -Selecthumor Sez: The zombie outbreak will most likely come from Boston

7:29 -Daniel Craig T. Nelson

7:30 -"What's Wonder Woman up to these days?"
"She's mostly wearing jackets"

7:31 -Statler and Waldorf are racist...

7:37 -Neon-Gene one-shot

7:39 -"I'm tripping on Benadryl!" -Will

7:40 -Dan goes into action like Spider-man...trips over chair

7:44 -Reverend Andre the Giant 3000

7:46 -Gimme Pizza Slow

7:46 -Paula Dean makes a Luther in slow motion

7:53 -Cinemassacre Monster Madness 2010: Infra-Man (1975)...BOOM!

Then, some awkward things happened and I wanted everything to go BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOOMMM!

Joey's GAMER CHAT & REVIEWS: Heavy Rain and Metroid: Other M

2010-10-25T00:00:00.012-04:00

Yo, guys, it’s your old pal Joey Merrick and it’s time for my riff on the current state of gaming culture. If you notice anything awesome about today’s post, it’s the fact that I just got blue blockers (finally found some that fit my head)—I took that picture as soon as I got home and filtered it with some sweet photoshop effects—I’m like Che Guevara, but for the gamers (and sexier too, lol)

I’d like to thank admin “Fancier Dan” for lettin’ me post on his account, considering the fact that none of the other admins will let me have an account (I know, WTF, man. Whatev.)

Let’s see if we can break things down, shall we?

Let's see who will get the coveted "THUMBS UP"

First review, dudes:

HEAVY RAIN

Let’s see, plot: blah blah blah, some guy’s a killer or some shit, blah, blah, more talking, naked chick, some more shit, etc… Yeah, one of those was pretty awesome (I’m talkin’ about that sweet ass cut scene with a fine female—sadly, design is lacking, should have went with a DOA: Beach Volleyball design, you know what I’m talkin’ about!), but other than that short brilliance the rest is BORING! It tries to be all psychological and shit, but if I wanted any of that I’d steal my Mom’s prescriptions out of her purse and head over to the Duane Reade.

There’s a mini game where you have to take care of a baby. WTF? If I wanted that I’d go over to my Aunt’s and babysit the cousins (not doing that, bitches). That, my friends, is a capital B to the OGUS. Bogus.

I only got half way through the game (hell, I don’t even know) when I threw down my game controller and had enough of this shit. I took that M.F.er back to the Blockbuster faster than you can say, “the Wii controller sucks ass-balls” (I swear, I’m keepin’ that Blockbuster alive with all my game rentals, lol).

These game designers (Quantum Dream, obviously) need to get their act together—thank Jeebus (Simspons, lol) I still got my ever-lovin copies of Halo: Reach and CoD (that’s “Call of Duty” for you noobs). You want drama? Load those discs in, bitches. I’ll show you drama.

I give it:

NO THUMBS UP.

METROID: Other M

Fun play, at least it had real shooting unlike that gag-fest I reviewed above. You shoot some aliens and shit, don’t remember most of the plot—I was playin’ it at my Mom’s house at like 3 in the morning so I put the TV on mute, put earbuds in and listened to some badass Muse.

You shoot things, they explode. What else can a gamer ask for? This almost makes you forget how sucky the Wii controller is (super sucky).

Super mega bonus: We get to see Samus without her armor suit on more. Super hot, needs more boobage, but I take what I can get. Her armor even comes off when she takes more damage (definition of wicked, man!!!). I remember back on Super Smash for the N64 I would pause that shit every time Samus got a thunder bolt from Pikachu (naked pixels ftw!!!1). I’m still looking for the nude patch for this sucker. A friend on a message board told me one would be released soon, so I’m holdin’ on. Can’t wait.

Couldn’t finish the game though, dudes. Right arm started cramping up from the pressure, then I got the ol’ seizures again. Mom had to rush me to the hospital. Dr. Treves gets super pissed when I play games, says it doesn’t comply with my bone structure. Eff him. Gamer till I die, WOOT WOOT!

I give Metroid: Other M:

FOUR THUMBS UP.

X 4!

——GAMING NEWS, BROS:

MARVEL VS. CAPCOM: Fate of Two Worlds looks so hella sweet—the definition of sweetness (“Fate of Two Worlds = FTW, lmao). Best part looks to be the inclusion of Deadpool, who IS the best Marvel character of all time. He’s awesome because he’s funny but he’s also willing to blow your head away. CHIK-CHIK BOOM! He could kick Captain America’s and Spider-man’s ass if he really want to—and let’s just say my shelf is packed with Deadpool trade paperbacks—game should be called DEADPOOL: FTW. Let’s just say I can relate to the dude: He’s a badass and he’s got a scarred up face underneath his mask (lol).

Hope a nude patch for Chun Li shows up.

—

That butt-face Roger Ebert still sayin’ shit about videogames? He just doesn’t get us, man. Games are life—life is art.

Damn, I got poetic there for a sec (no homo, lol).

Old man Ebert is just like my Mom and Dr. Fred Treves. They’re always ragging on me about my gaming, and I’m sick of it. Josh from down the street says that over the summer he’s gonna road trip with his bros to LA for some big skating tourney, thought I could tag along, hang out in the promised land for a while, get picked up as a game tester, then hit it big! So long, Mom and Dr. Treves. I’ll be in the big time! (don’t tell my Mom, lol)

Well, that about wraps up my game-talk. I’ll get back to you guys as soon as I can. Mom’s yelling at me, need to wash some crevices before she takes me out to her church group brunch down at the Applebee’s. She better have cleaned my burlap sack, hate when it itches. Shit, this is gonna blow. She HAS to let me play CoD after this.

JOEY M. OUT!

CBL Movie Review: Paprika

2010-10-24T15:00:00.005-04:00

All the die-hard moviegoers can punch me in the face for not having seen Inception (yet). However, given the screencaps and plot summaries I have read of the latter, I can (semi-safely) say that were Inception a brightly lit, beautifully animated technicolor mindfuck, it would be like Paprika.

So what is this movie about? Dreams. Dream technology. Psychology. Freudian allusions and Jungian images (butterflies, dolls, wise old men). Mostly, it's a wild, gorgeous trek through surrealist landscapes and nonsensical dialogues, frozen running and familiar strangers that we so often find hiding in the corners of our own minds. There's funny and creepy, disturbing and psychedelic, and when it's over you want to slide that little bar on your computer to the way, way, left, and experience it all over again.

Paprika, Satoshi Kon, 2006. Rated R.

All About Will (10/14/10)

2010-10-21T13:04:00.002-04:00

7:03 -"You're eating rocks on Halloween!...or something rock like...like crumble cake -or a really old biscuit" -Will

7:04 -Denim Trench Coat stole all the free food! He was carrying a whole damn tray!

7:10 -Nude Doom Patrol

7:11 -A Mummy wearing a diaper

7:13 -"Andrew, open your mouth" -Dan

7:14 -Selecthumor is having religious prophecies about "Back to the Future 4"

7:18 -Shirtless man wearing a Speedo? Zangief.

7:20 -Bruce Campbell wore a bow tie at NYCC

7:21 -Steven Seagal owns a winery -and a Carvel franchise

7:24 -The Beetlejuice stage show at Universal Studios Hollywood makes us feel bad...like "The Garbage Pail Kids Movie" bad

7:25 -Clint Howard is Justin Bieber's future

7:26 -"Wheatsworth -its like a butler made out of bread" -Will

7:36 -Dan's presentation of his script for "Wizard Dog". "Four stars. Check it out." -Mike

7:44 -Wendy kills a dolphin

7:47 -"Basil Bub" -Selecthumor

7:49 -"Will, you just crack yourself up" -Courtney
"I know. I'm vain" -Will

7:52 -Taimur went on a date to see "The Addams Family" musical

7:53 -New Scooby-Doo cartoon reveals that Fred is totally gay

7:57 -"Let's all remember 'Accepted'!"

7:59 -Taimur is frantically searching Manhattan for a vest

8:00 -"There's a pretty good vest place near my dorm" -Will

8:01 -"We hit our quote for necrophilia" -Will

8:07 -Will is always ready to punch any Communist in the face

8:11 -"...I rub it in their faces, even if they're right" -Will

8:15 -"I think Will just came out" -Courtney
"I have trouble not being an asshole. It's a problem" -Will

8:19 -"I'm going to be successful in my endeavors. You can be, too."
"Gee, thanks."

8:20 -"When you're with me, you can only think about me!" -Will

8:25 -"We named the dog X-Wing Fighter"

8:29 -"That dog should burn in Dog Hell...and I mean that in the sincerest way" -Dan

8:30 -Porno Steve -we reached our foot fetish quota.

Then, we all went out to dinner at Veselka. ALF was discussed. 'Nuff said.

Greatest American Comic Book League Meeting (10/7/10)

2010-10-14T13:57:00.013-04:00

7:01 -"You’re gonna pick up a whore?! You’re really gonna pick up a whore! Aw, that’s -that’s just great. You want your cab to smell like whore? Because that’s what’s gonna happen if you pick up that whore!"

7:09 -We can hardly wait for the television adaptation “The Walking Dead” -ZOMBIES!

7:16 -“My favorite president is Courtney” -Will

“What about Teddy Roosevelt? Hey, what about Taft?” -Mike

7:18 -It’s A Fact: William Howard Taft is the only president to serve most of his presidency in a bathtub

7:20 -”Pee-Wee*? He’s probably dead at this point.” -Will *Pee-Wee the gas station attendant*

7:21 -“‘To Kill a Mockingbird’ was written during the Civil War, right? It’s a sci-fi novel like ‘1984’. He got it right...Yeah, Harper Lee is George Orwell’s pen name.” -Will

7:22 -“Congratulations, Mr. Simms. You are the fattest boy in camp” -Lars from Heavyweights

7:24 -“Do you still own the suit?” -Selecthumor to William Katt, the former star of ‘Greatest American Hero’

7:25 -Selecthumor informs us that there was an unaired pilot for a spin-off of ‘Greatest American Hero’ called ‘Greatest American Heroine’…’Greatest American Heroine’, really?

7:27 -Return of the Denim trench coat

7:29 -Whatever happened to Wyatt Wingfoot?

7:31 -“Hey everybody, we’re all gonna get laid!” -Al Czervik (Rodney Dangerfield), Caddyshack

7:33 -Blood match for the CBL Presidency!

7:35 -Calvin Coolidge was the Wolverine of the U.S. Presidents

7:37 -“Duck boobies!” -Taimur

7:38 -“Yeah, Michael J. Fox was in the duck suit.” -Will

7:41 -Will has ~~veto~~ Don Vito power

7:44 -The Chili Dog Whisperer

7:46 -Tim Allen as Mary Jane Watson

7:48 -Dylan Baker was probably really pissed about ‘Spider-man 4’ being cancelled

7:50 -We’re all intrigued by “The Seven Brothers Meet Dracula”

7:54 -Dan plays “Eternal Flame” by The Bangles on his phone for no reason

7:55 -“Jimmy Neutron is like Dexter’s Lab for Down Syndrome kids” -*name withheld*

7:59 -Dan just told Will to take Selecthumor to the shaft…y’know like Vader did to Emperor Palpatine.

8:00 -Zing of the Night: “She [Helen Keller] graduated from Harvard with a law degree. You couldn’t do that with all of your senses” -Eitan to Will

8:05 -Is Estelle “Mother” Winslow still alive?…Nope. Aw.

8:09 -Taimur’s nickname would be Scene-It

8:10 -“Aw, c’mon! Get those Plagues off of my Fangoria!” -Mike

8:12 -Howard Dean looks like he has the Eitan disease -Eitan-itis

8:18 -“Did you know Patrick Warburton is the voice of Brock Samson on ‘The Venture Brothers’?” -Slowpoke Eitan

8:20 -“We don’t actually shit on Jeff -that’s unsanitary.”

8:22 -“He bought half of his wardrobe at Universal Studios” -Will

8:25 -“Imagine I have as many rings as The Mandarin and T-Rex arms” -Dan, preparing for an impression

8:28 -Phil Molnar is the man

8:31 -Whatever Happened to Tim Curry?

8:34 -Tee shirt & pin-stripe suit pants with Converses is not a good look. At all.

8:36 -Plato, you asshole!

8:38 -Danny Tamberelli let himself go

8:39 -“It’s gone. It fell off the Internet” -Will

8:41 -“Do they have a Bangles wine?” -Dan

8:42 -Wendy doesn’t like us

8:43 -Best Vampire Movie: Dracula: Dead and Loving It

Best Zombie Movie: Sex & The City 2

8:45 -Best Group Cosplay Idea: Recess

8:47 -Andrew is the Young Phil Molnar

8:49 -Recess: The Later Years

8:52 -“Did your car get stuck in the lake that Moses parts?” -Will

8:58 -“Grandma, get off the phone! You’re ruining my connection! I’m trying to post on the ‘Hey Arnold!’ message board!”

9:01 -Taimur starts singing “Grease Lightning”

9:03 -“I just pooped my pants…metaphorically” -Dan

9:06 -“Say it with me, Dan -BULLSHIT!” -Will

9:07 -Will is a lesbian

9:11 -Tommy Pickles is retarded

9:15 -Newt Gingrich looks like the digital number nine

9:18 -We’re just a buncha noids

9:21 -Lorie Beth Denberg got fired for sexual harassment. They were going to sue her for all her Vital Information for Everyday Life

9:25 -“I’m doing the ‘Rocky Horror Picture Show’ down at the rec center”

9:29 -“Oh my God! The bio teacher’s doing a Poo Bear with a jar of peanut butter in the lab!”

9:31 -Vito Corleone power

9:34 -Chicken fries!

9:40 -Dan Aykroyd from ‘Canadian Bacon’ will be here all week

9:45 -We waited until 9:45. We'll get you next time, Kraft! Next time! *shakes fist dramatically*

A Hot Nerdy Mess: 2 Days of NYCC Madness

2010-10-12T23:10:00.030-04:00

I, Wendy, your humble narrator, shall walk you through the life-altering two days I was at NYCC.

Day 1

I have a horrible confession to make. Until last Friday I, in a hassled and confused state (bus times, friend arrival mixups, etc) outside the Javits Center, had never gone to a comic convention before. The very first snatch of fellow con-goer conversation I catch involves Daleks (now I REALLY know I’m in the right place, as though all the costumes didn’t give it away). I squeeze my way past Batman, Ms. Marvel, a few ninjas with their respective village headbands and five Sweet Lolitas to make my way to the DC booth where our beloved Madame President Courtney is to save me from the onslaught. The rest:

I stop at the Marvel booth to say hello to my old bosses (hi Jordan!)! I finally meet the famous Agent M! I grouch over the loss of working around action figures all day long for horrid physics lectures with freshman philosophy majors (DIE)! Then:

Artist’s Alley: Katie Cook of Marvel Cats’ fame—Spider Cat versus Sand Cat. A total sweetheart who did a five dollar watercolor and pen commission for me of Chessie and three for Madame Prez. I say hi and shake hands with Scott Reed, the writer of Incredible Hulks: Enigma Force, which I worked on during my last days at Marvel. A moment of synchronicity: Madame Prez and I are found by Fancier Dan and Andrew, then all of us ambush Mike and Will three aisles away (Will’s shiny blue Human Torch outfit helped). We all troll around the floor. Many many photo ops for Will! Then (sans Courtney, boo):

Robot Chicken Panel, After Waiting An Hour In Line, Listening To Will Bemoan How Tired He Is: Macaulay Culkin, Seth Green, Seth Green’s Wife and Matthew Seinreich. Potential vague spoilers for the upcoming season: Home Alone (hence Macaulay Culkin’s appearance), Christmas and more Star Wars. After:

Venture Bros’ Panel, And Will Is Still Tired: “Quit wastin’ my time-time!” Henchmen, Q&A, rabid fans, uproarious laughter, I-can’t-say-much-more-since-I-don’t-watch-the-show-but-should-I-know-but-it-was-funny-nonetheless.

Will poses for one last photo even as we’re getting kicked out of the convention center.

Day 2

I roll my four-hours-of-sleep ass out of my bunk, don my pink shades as the X-Men's Jubilee and brace myself for the craziest day at NYCC: Saturday. The mile long line for those poor unfortunate souls who didn’t get tickets in advance make me clutch my treasured weekend pass beneath my yellow coat and thank Asgard and Odin (maybe I should have asked the Thor and Lady Sif I saw to thank Odin for me) that I get to dodge it.

Once again, a meet up with Madame President Courtney, our very own Taimur (TDSpidey616!) and Fancier Dan cosplaying as Ambush Bug outside the Marvel booth. I get cosplay photos taken on the Marvel stage and for Newsarama. We wait outside the bathroom for Will and then something magical happens:

An old man in glasses and a tan suit steps into the bathroom. One double take later: it’s Stan “The Man” himself. Yes, we are inches away from him (peeing). Fancier Dan shouts it and Mike tweets it and I would have too but my phone is a piece of shit and doesn’t get Internet. One group-split later (someone fill the readers in on the Avengers panel, please):

We troll the floor some more, get some Punishers signed for Mike, migrate to the Artist’s Alley where it is marginally less crowded, dodge some Death Eaters, and try to find an ATM in the desolate wasteland that is the far west side of Manhattan (eventually we do). I meet the famous Serge of Midtown Comics and get educated on the origins of “Cool story, bro”. Will gets groped by an Orange Lantern. I get groped by a pair of Old Greggs sporting matching miniature Baileys bottles. I like it. There are many rounds of high fives, a few more photo ops and a shout or two of “JUUUUUUUBES!” There are Deadpools, Ichigos, Lolitas, Chun Li, Green Lantern with Black Canary, Boba Fett, Stormtroopers, and Elastigirl (Doom Patrol, not The Incredibles!). Unfortunately, no more Stan Lee sightings (bathroom or otherwise).

Team Assembles Again post-Avengers: some random chick in loli getup comes up to us and shouts “BOOBIES?” I guess. Taimur proceeds to get slain by Ares. Q&A Panel with Joe Quesada, Brian Michael Bendis, Axel Alonso, Arune Singh, Tom Brevoort, Jeph Loeb, Dan Buckley and CB Cebulski: Will asks about Marvelfest (sadly not happening this year, Quesada apologized). Some guy gets booed out of the room for bitching about how much Quesada sucks in the mic. Said guy should die in a fire, honestly, who does that (answer: assholes). Taimur introduces me to Bendis, whose books I also worked on all summer long at the office. I shake Bendis’s hand (check Phil's video for live coverage!) and grin (he grins back and apologizes for making me proofread all those scripts! What a nice guy!); we all offer our tributes of “Dude you’re awesome!"

The Rest Of The Afternoon: We hunt for merchandise. We look high and low and near and far for this one poster stand where the day before I’d bought a Totoro poster. We finally find it thanks to Will’s sense of direction. Posters, check. The T-shirt stands become lighthouses in the Sea Of Hot Messes And Random Car And Toy Fliers. T-shirts, check. Toys are ogled, two Penguins bought for Madame President. The floor lights suddenly start shutting off and that is our cue to leave. We wait outside on some hard stone benches, admire our haul, and present Courtney with her Penguins. One of the Penguins is missing his vest and socks and both are missing their umbrellas, but if you squeeze the smaller one’s legs together it looks like it’s, um… doing a questionable up-and-down gesture! With that, it’s time to go home.

All photos with me in it are taken by Will (except for the Marvel flickr and Newsarama blog); otherwise they are taken by myself.

EMMA STONE AS GWEN STACY!

2010-10-12T01:27:00.013-04:00

As the film world now knows, the role of Spider-man’s love interest in the Spider-man reboot has gone to actress Emma Stone.

Ms. Stone’s casting as Gwen Stacy, one of Spider-man’s most beloved girlfriends, comes to no shock—primarily because she looks absolutely nothing like former love interest Mary Jane Watson.

But who is Emma Stone? Where did she come from? What’s her deal?

We may never know, nor will we ever find out, but we do know that this is the thrust her career needed. Now that she's been cast in a super-comic hero film, her face is going to be on everything from coffee mugs to franchise-endorsed rock tumblers!

Here are just a few of the roles the star of Easy A has been cast into:

Emma Stone takes on the role of Tim Allen’s “Santa Clause”. During a freak accident, the Santa Clause and his elves awaken sleeping dinosaurs from below the North Pole’s underground caverns, once thought to be lost during the Ice Age. It’s up to the Santa Clause and his magical, jive-talking reindeer to subdue the primeval beasts and save Christmas! Word on the street is that Ms. Stone fought for the role vigorously, as it was always her dream to play the mystical bearded jolly-man Saint Nick. Also, she sounds just like Tim Allen.

Hotel for Dogs is back again! And it’s got a role for Ms. Stone too! She will play Emma Roberts’ shoes. The plot for the film is hush-hush for the time being, with some reports saying that it will reflect the times and involve the current financial crisis. Actor Don Cheadle has dropped out of the film, noted as disagreeing with the direction of the franchise. He has been replaced by Terrence Howard.

That’s right—Spider-man 2! Emma Stone has been cast as Doctor Octopus, fiendish villain of the Spider-man. Word on the street is that her origin will be nearly identical to the comic book incarnation, with the only difference being that the Doctor will be a blonde (believe it or not, Ms. Stone is a true blonde!). The plot involves Doctor Octopus stealing the moon in hopes that he can impress Mary Jane Watson, so she will ask him to the Sadie Hawkins Dance. The Spider-man must get the moon back before midnight or the moon’s disappearance will mess with the earth’s tides, flooding New York City with water and gross sea animals! I can’t wait for this one!

This is the same exact film as the first one, it’s just that Emma Stone’s face was digitally rendered on every single actor’s face. Word on the street is that this picture won’t be released until the body of Lindsay Lohan is found.

This was the last movie I could think of.

--fancier dan

New York Comic Con

2010-10-11T20:51:00.002-04:00

Phil Molnar here. I've posted my videos below. A bunch of Leaguetteers in the second video. Huzzah!

CBL Movie Review: "Let Me In"

2010-10-07T16:33:00.004-04:00

"Don't let the poster fool you, folks. There are zero snow angels to be found in this flick"

Movie Totals:

11 dead bodies
1 breast
1 awesome car crash
Multiple gallons of blood
Gratuitous Bowie
Gratuitous period piece
Gratuitous Now & Laters
Bully Fu (including Wedgie Fu and Pointer Fu)
Metal Rod Fu
Acid Fu
Heads bob
Heads roll
Necks roll
10 heartwarming preteen/vampire romance moments

"Let Me In" is an honest effort from Matt Reeves, the fella that directed "Cloverfield", in remaking (or what turkeys consider making an homage to) the original 2008 Swedish film "Let the Right One In". I've never seen the original, but I've heard good things. Well, you've got your romance. You've got your horror. Mix that together with Chloe Moretz as a creepy vampire kid and you've got a pretty darn good movie. That's why it gets 4 stars. Check it out.

Unterhaltsam Comicheft!

2010-10-07T16:20:00.004-04:00

Here's a special treat, Leaguetteers -two Spidey-themed comics from last Spring's super-smash-hit publication, "Return of the Spring Slaughterfest". We here at the Comic Book League were very excited to sign an exclusive deal with Jurgen Fruchauf & Tortsen Ackermann, Germany's greatest untergrund comix team, for the rights to publish their comics in the good ol' U-S-of-A. We hope to see more from those kooky krauts in the future!

To Kill a Comic Book League (9/30/10)

2010-10-07T16:08:00.006-04:00

7:01 -”I love a good gorilla character” -Mike

7:02 -Comic Book League picks for a “Secret Avengers”-esque team set in the DC Universe -“Secret Justice”

Will’s Team: Larfleeze, The Flash, Blue Beetle, Beast Boy, Larry Trainor (Negative Man), Aqua Man

Mike’s Team: Gorilla Grodd, Batman, Green Arrow, Martian Manhunter, Hawkman, L-Ronn

7:06 -Our President’s back/Boo Radley sighting

7:10 -Boo Radley’s being mean

7:12 -Boo Radley scared off our awesome cover artist

7:15 -Socks are being blown off left and right

7:16 -Surprise appearance by Taimur

7:18 -Hipster Galactus

7:20 -Taimur’s Team: Monsieur Mallah, B’wana Beast, Plastic Man, Ace the
Bathound, Starro, Firestorm

7:30 -Giovanni from “Pokemon” is a famous Renaissance artist

7:33 -“Double Rainbow is overrated and lame” -Mike

7:34 -“Boo Radley, 10 points from Ravenclaw!…another 10 points from Ravenclaw!” -Will

7:36 -Universal Studios Amusement Park Theater starring Dan Costales. Tonight’s feature: The Hanna-Barbera Ride

7:42 -“First off, they go down easy” -Will

7:45 -Courtney was meeting with DJ and the rest of the Tanner family in San Francisco

7:48 -“Do you burn your clothes everyday?”

7:49 -CBL’s new greatest hero: Pee Jar Man -The Justice League’s newest member hurls mason jar filled with, well, pee

7:50 -Possible arch-enemy for Pee Jar Man -Shit-On-You Guy

7:51 -“Why do you always want bodily fluids in our issue?!” -Courtney

7:52 -In a dark, apocalyptic future, the CBL New Gods must stand against the tyranny of Boo "Darkseid" Radley…they are The Devil (Will), Devil Dinosaur (Dan), a Hostess Devil Dog (Mike)

7:54 -Drunk Yoda -“I thought he was gonna puke in the mask”-Will

7:57 -Courtney’s Halloween Costume: George McFly

7:59 -”Will, are you the one in the gown?” -Courtney

8:00 -”Everyone was gonna have a great time, but you ruined it” -Will

8:13 -Pregnant Pebbles

8:16 -Pee Jar Man and Purple Arrow -Besties from Hebrew Camp

8:17 -New Title for our upcoming publication: Fall Fap Fest!

8:21 -Our President is playing Bejeweled

8:24 -It’s a Fact: Phil Molnar broke his leg bootlegging sour mash whiskey

8:26 -“Dan, you’re such an asshole!” -Courtney

8:28 -Scene: Batman staring awkwardly at Pee Jar Man

For some reason, the meeting ends early and we wind up at Toy Tokyo. ‘Nuff said.

Hello, My Name Is… (9/23/10)

2010-10-07T15:49:00.005-04:00

7:00 -Free name tags!

7:02 -All the books in Bobst look old and intimidating

7:05 -Shadowland & Hercules Recap. Summation: Too many Shadowland tie-ins and we can hardly wait for Chaos King.

7:09 -Jeff Paker is awesome

7:13 -Fancier Dan earns his moniker with a dashing neckerchief

7:17 -Hipster Gepetto teaches dramatic writing.

7:20 -Spain + Newspaper Reporter + Bronze Age = “It’s The Bronze Age”

7:23 -Dan had a dream where he performed “Mummy in America” as Ambush Bug at a Comedy Festival

7:26 -“I got this in the mail in a tiny package -I look like a sex maniac” -Dan

7:30 -Eitan demonstrates his super-strength by moving four chairs at once, with Mike and Wendy sitting in them

7:37 -Discussion of the stage version of “Mummy in America”

7:43 -Alternate Endings to “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows”

7:44 -World’s 2^nd Greatest Pokemon Card Game Player

7:48 -Hogwarts is like Waco or Jonestown

7:50 -Poor William Atherton -everyone calls him “dickless”

7:54 -Zack Galifianakis is the contemporary Bill Murray

7:55 -“You just put your finger in my mouth!” -Will

“Don’t worry, I washed my hands purely in in herpes infested semen” -Eitan

“Hey, that sounds like a new Hanson song” -Dan

8:00 -Zack Galifianakis is the modern day Humphrey Bogart.

8:01 -Zack Galifianakis as the entire cast in of “Ghostbusters 3”

8:03 -”If there’s one thing we can teach you in this club, it’s to be couth” *Eitan belches loudly*

8:07 -New Club Rule: No Quidditch

8:08 -”He sold his bed to Nien Nunb!"

8:15 -Eitan cut off one of his Grandma’s fingers in a door jam

8:21 -Now Will is wearing a neckerchief

8:23 -It’s a Fact: Bill Paxton played drums on the original recording of “Sunshine of Your Love”

8:25 -Will’s Sparknotes Bible is autographed by Ronald Reagan

8:27 -Conference call with our missing President -she hung up on us.

8:30 -Free Donkey Kong arcade machine on the 9^th floor of the Tisch building

8:32 -Bible fight!

8:36 -The ending of TORCH #2 is the same as the ending of the “Thriller” music video

8:39 -Giving Wendy the pen knife was a bad idea

8:45 -”If the Batman can do it, why can’t I?” -Dan

8:46 -New Favorite Member: Chair

8:48 -Eitan has the Spengler Effect

8:50 -Mothra Coppola -“Come to me, Mothra. Come to me”

8:52 -“Tojo is a war criminal, not a Godzilla monster!” -Will

8:54 -King Kong’s Brother Theory: The King Kong featured in “Godzilla vs. King Kong” is smaller than the Kong featured in the

original “King Kong“; therefore, we believe that “King” is a title and that the next in line would assume the title after the original Kong’s death at the end the 1933 film, most likely his brother, Larry. The explanation for Larry’s smaller appearance is that it’s like the movie “Twins” -one brother (the original Kong) received all the "desirable traits" and the other (Larry, the 2^nd King) was a "genetic trash".

9:01 -“Godzilla ’98 is when I fell in love with Jean Reno” -Mike

9:03 -Godzilla ’98 was hiding in the River of Slime

9:05 -Minilla…Godzilla’s son’s name is Minilla?!

9:06 -Darwyn Cooke Revenge Fantasy

9:08 -”Kneel Before Eitan!” -Eitan For CBL President Propaganda posters

9:10 -Lovitz & Levitz, Attorneys at Law

9:14 -Our Nega-Levitz is more moley

9:20 -Rory Zip, the hunchback banker

First Official Meeting (9/16/10)

2010-10-07T15:38:00.004-04:00

*Special Guest Star* Taimur Dar as Taimur Dar

7:00 -About 12 new prospective members

7:01 -Our President is being attacked by a tornado in Brooklyn

7:02 -A selection from Vice President Eitan’s opening remarks “Many of you will not be here in the following weeks. This is not a threat of physical violence, but because many of you will lose interest. My suggestion is that you do show up because that will add to the chances that we’ll learn your names.”

7:05 -Will and Mike are like Statler & Waldorf

7:10 -Dan’s plans for NYCC: Attend a DC panel dressed as Ambush Bug and give Dan DiDio a drawing of Joe Quesada as a Quesadilla

7:13 -Dan Slott/Danny DeVito Romance

7:15 -Justin the Biebarian

7:19 -“…jabs made, deals broken.”

7:22 -“Now we actually have confident females.” -Dan

7:24 -“Father Doesn’t Like” starring Chen Chen Chen

7:27 -Cosby Show Trivia

7:29 -Ace Frehley is like Rodney Dangerfield -he gets no respect

7:32 -Dan’s Golden Girls/Twilight/Harry Potter slash fiction

7:35 -Boba Fett knows who IG-88 is

7:37 -Pee-Wee Herman sucks as a pirate

7:40 -Wendy interrupts Dan story

7:43 -Will purposely spills Coke on the Minutes -“When aliens find this stuff years from now, they’ll wonder what happened”

7:44 -Universal Studios Amusement Park Theater starring Dan Costales. Tonight’s feature: The Wizarding World of Harry Potter

7:54 -“The last time I drank out of cups like these I was dancing the Macarena” - Will

7:57-
-Straight Shooter
-Kept the Commies in place
-Won the Vietnam War
-Excellent Hair
-Knew how to wear a Power Suit

Will’s Reasons to Vote for Nixon or What Will’s Dungeons & Dragons Character Sheet would look like?

8:02 -“We make tasteful, intellectual dick jokes, like, about Alexander Hamilton’s dick, not about a dying African’s dick -not like The Plague” -Dan

8:05 -It’s a Fact: There are monkeys in the Psych Dept. basement
“They locked up The Monkees in the Psych Dept. basement?!” -Mike

8:06 -Isn’t it weird how in the first Harry Potter movie, they said “Happy Christmas” and not “Merry Christmas”?

8:09 -Everyone is just ragging on Space Ace

8:13 -Other names for Other Andrew
-Stevie
-H.K.
-Burton Guster
-We could just call him Andrew

8:15 -Will talks about his years as a street fighter in school and how he wrecked this one kid’s face, “He stole my shoe, so he got shit [a knee to the face] in return.”

8:18 -Ferocious Rhinoceroses

8:20 -“My teeth are in such bad condition” -Will

8:22 -Love springs on the battlefield -Will vs. Eitan

8:26 -Spader-Man Dino Damage Stegosaurus Napkin Holder

8:29 -Michael Anthony: The Nicest Man in Rock n’ Roll

8:31 -“The Beatles are the British Hall and Oates” -Dan

8:33 -Young love at The CBL

8:35 -Jurassic Park Arcade Shooter: The Brontosaurus shits on you

8:38 -The John Hammond action figure was a repaint of The Penguin and the Newman action figure was unusually buff

8:41 -Spader-Man milks a stegosaurus

8:44 -Behold, Action Jesus

8:46 -“The Muhammad Action Figure is just an empty plastic container” - Selecthumor

8:48 -“He does fart! Listen!” -Will, on the Jurassic Park Stegosaurus figure

8:50 -Zack Galifianakis in the film adaptation of “Greatest American Hero”

8:52 -Tommy Wiseau Experience. Will’s Ideas for a live-action adaptation of “Bonkers”

8:54 -Billy Dee Williams’ Family Style Restaurant. Entrées include Lando Linguini, Bespin Back Ribs, and Colt 45 Battered Steak. Nien Nunb works a busboy.

8:56 -In the Bill & Ted’s Excellent Halloween Adventure, the cast of Seinfeld was able to push the Back to the Future DeLorean

8:58 -Selecthumor concludes that Spider-man is the “Run & Tell That” rapist